My tween-age daughter has always been painfully shy and struggled to make new friends. Thankfully, last year, she and two other girls became inseparable. After-school activities, weekends together - whenever they weren’t busy with family or in class, they were together.

This summer, one went to Italy to see her grandmother (for two months!), and the other went to sleepover camp (also for two months!). My daughter worked at an ice cream shop near our cottage, where she spends her time with her cousins.

Now everyone is back and the other two girls aren’t talking to each other or my daughter. The trio has imploded, but my daughter has no idea why. And now she’s all alone, all the time.

How can I help her figure out what happened, and help her move on and find new friends?

Three’s a crowd

I can only assume that if those three girls were inseparable as tween-agers, you must be in contact with the other moms (carpools, sleepovers, etc.). Would it be possible to call the one you felt more connected to and ask her if she knows what happened between the girls?

I realize that kids of that age don’t like their parents to “meddle,” but if you’re really in the dark as to what went down, I think you have every right to inquire. The worst possible scenario is that mom ghosts you; you reach out to the other mom, and she also ghosts you. But if they’re decent people, I just don’t see that happening.

I don’t suggest that you three can fix the problem, but you’d stand a remote chance if you had a clue as to what happened over the course of the summer. Best case scenario, whatever the issue was can be solved with the help of all three moms. Worst case for your daughter, the friendship trio is done. It sounds like it already is, so you have nothing to lose by trying.

I suggest a coach (like a life coach for adults) who can help your daughter navigate these tough years and teach her how to make friends and keep them. I’m not suggesting at all that whatever happened is her fault; but maintaining friendships is tricky business, especially in today’s world of social media.

My boyfriend is an amazing handyman and is always offering to fix things or make things for me. He built me a beautiful walk-in closet in my apartment and a dog room under the stairs in my parent’s home.

We recently purchased our first home, and we did so after walking through numerous times and discussing all the things that needed fixing and how we would do it in stages, all DIY to save money. We laid out a one-month, a three-month and a six-month plan to get the house up to speed. And then an itemized two-year plan to get it where we really want it.

The problem? It’s been two months and he’s done NONE of the things on our one-month list! And they’re the most basic! Now I’m worried he’ll never get anything done! He storms out when I try to talk to him.

Have I made the biggest mistake of my life?

Unhelpful Partner

Either your partner was all talk or he’s overwhelmed and fears he took on more than he can handle. Go for a walk in the woods, away from the house, with your dog, and talk. Maybe you two need to reassess and create a new plan. And, if he’s having second thoughts about everything, get out now before you get in any deeper.

We all make mistakes; some are just harder to fix than others.

FEEDBACK Regarding alone but not single (June 25):

Reader – “You’re an extremely dedicated and dutiful husband. You recognize that the change in your wife is due to her illness, something no one can control.  You are not alone.

“I would also suggest joining a group of people in your similar situation, understanding you’re not alone and learning how they manage. It’s important you get off your butt and do SOMETHING.  Just going for daily 15-minute walks helps clear your head and clear those negative thoughts.

“Yes, continue visiting your wife.  She may not recognize you, but facility staff will know you are present.  If any issues arise, you’re available to discuss. Even though she cannot do anything for herself or recognize people, she still deserves the best care available.  It’s NOT her fault that she has this illness. But it’s not yours, either.”

Lisi – Sadly, I agree that he needs to live his life without her.