We are a family of three sisters. Our parents married and had me, the eldest, almost immediately. Apparently, I was a handful (in a good but busy way), my parents were young, and both wanted a few years to focus on their career before having a second child.

But three years later, in a situation that has never been fully explained, they adopted my younger sister. My grandparents were around more at that time, having closed their retail store of several decades, and were very helpful with my sister and me. I know my parents were grateful because they both jumped to high levels in their careers at that same time.

Though I was little, I thought our family was complete – until my mom got pregnant with my youngest sister, who she swears was NOT an accident. Looking at the timeline, I have to believe her, but back then, I didn’t. The next two decades were idyllic, as we sisters got along very well. Unfortunately, both our grandparents passed away while we were in our teens.

Now our mom is unwell, and we are spending as much time with her as we can. Recently she spoke privately to our middle sister, and something has changed. That sister has become withdrawn, sad and my youngest sister and I can’t tell if she’s angry with us or simply pulling away. We love her and she’s our best friend. How can we get that message across to her not knowing what’s going on in her head?

Three Sisters

Obviously whatever your mom told your middle sister, it’s not sitting well with her. You can only surmise that it has to do with her adoption, but you don’t know that for fact.

Sounds like your focus should be on your mom right now, because if she’s having private chats with your sister, my guess is she’s not going to be around much longer. You could ask her what she told your sister, but don’t be offended if she opts not to share.

I suggest you speak to your sister and tell her that you love her no matter what your mom told her. That if she feels like she needs to unburden, or simply share, you’d be willing to listen. But conversely, if she wants to keep whatever secret she’s holding, you won’t be offended. And mean it.

Years ago, my sister did some modelling for a guy who said he would take the photos for free to help her get an agent. He was a friend of a friend, so she trusted him. It worked and she started modelling with an agency. That agency had her flying all over Europe, doing some great shoots and making a decent amount of money.

She then met her boyfriend, a photographer on one of her shoots. They’ve been together a year and have a secure relationship. He’s a lovely guy.

Just recently, a friend of his stumbled across photos of my sister, with little to no clothing on her body. The crazy thing is that she never posed naked. These photos were manipulated after the fact. She’s devastated! What do we do about that?

Not Her Body

That’s terrifying and disgusting. It’s incredible what people can do with technology and the internet. I spoke with local police authorities, and they suggested that your sister call in with more details. If the friend is asking for money to take the photos down, that’s extortion. If he just stumbled upon them and is letting her know, then she needs to figure out a way to have them taken down. So, she needs more information, and the police can get involved if necessary. According to my source, there’s no statute of limitations on these types of issues.

FEEDBACK Regarding the failed plan (March 5):

Reader – “They must remember that it’s no longer only their health and welfare but that now they must focus on the health of their unborn baby.  Especially the mother; she must take care of both her physical and mental health.  The stress she’s feeling now is being transferred to their baby.

“I think it’s time they rejig their wants vs. needs list.”

FEEDBACK Regarding the couple who “share” a toothbrush (March 6):

Reader – “I would talk with their dentist.  I agree with Lisi, but I think a more clinical approach is needed.

“Another suggestion would be to buy her an electric toothbrush for Christmas. There are statistics that using an electric toothbrush has been proven to be better for oral health.  Not only brushing teeth but also gum health.

“The benefit is that you can ‘share’ the same toothbrush, but you each have your own personal head, or brush.”