I’ve been dating a woman for about eight months. I like her a lot, she’s sweet and funny and we get along great. She’s been toying with the idea of moving to Los Angeles to try to make it as an actress. We live in a small town in Canada, and she’ll never make it big here, or be discovered.
I’m excited for her and want her to follow her dream, but – she’s a terrible actress and I can’t imagine that she’s going to be successful out there.
Is it my responsibility to let her know? It’s an expensive move for her, it’ll end our relationship, and it’s a major upheaval. All of which is fine if she gets out of it what she’s going for – including the end of our relationship. But I think it’s going to end in disappointment.
How do I proceed?
Worried beau
It’s not your responsibility or your place to be anything other than supportive. You say you like her a lot, but you’re also completely fine with the relationship ending. Let her do what she wants, live her own life, chase her dream and see what happens.
Help her pack, help her find housing if she needs, help her anyway she asks you to, and be positive and light. She needs a friend right now and that’s exactly what you are.
I have a few employees in my growing company. We are a luxury service, offered to those who can afford our high prices. I take my brand and my work very seriously, as do those who hire me. We are very specialized at what we do which is why we can charge the prices we charge.
Recently, while working on a job for a very prestigious client, one of my employees gave them the wrong timeline, giving them the impression that the work would be completed two months ahead of our initial timeline. The client was excited, naturally, and went ahead and purchased some items to be delivered and installed much earlier than we will be prepared for.
This all happened without any of my knowledge UNTIL the client came screaming down my throat that I promised things would be done and they weren’t. After much calming down of the client, and some digging, I figured out what had happened. When I asked my employee about it, they tried to justify their actions. But there was nothing to justify. They made a huge mistake which almost cost me my client!
How do I deal with this person?
Fuming
This is a situation that now lies in your hands. Your efforts should be in assuaging the client and making sure that you maintain a good relationship with them, despite the mistakes made. It may cost you to put their items in storage while you finish the work, or some other costs that may incur because of the error of your employee.
Moving on to your employee. This is a great opportunity for you. If you never really felt this person was a good fit, this is an easy excuse to let them go. If you like them and think they have potential but just made an error in judgment, this is your chance to educate them on how to be a better employee, and perhaps one day, an understanding employer.
At the end of the day, we need to own up to our mistakes, apologize for any inconvenience we caused as a result, learn and move forward. Anything else is a waste of time.
FEEDBACK Regarding the travelling family (March 21):
Reader #1 – “This couple couldn’t take 30 seconds to check their boarding passes to ensure they were correct before they got to the gate. No one waits until they’re on board before checking their seat numbers.
“Travelling with children of any age doesn’t mean the parents can pass off their responsibilities, especially not to a stewardess. Their job is to ensure the cabin and all passengers are safely ready for takeoff. With a plane full of people this can mean minimum attention to specific passengers’ problems.
“My experience with stewards is that most do an excellent job. But lately, with drunks, the ‘woke’ fanatics, and the TikTok halfwits, I can sympathize why some stewards might appear to be less friendly.”
Reader #2 – “There are systems in place to book specific seats on airplanes. This letter suggests that this family decided not to, thinking (like many parents) they should deserve some special treatment.
“You want to sit together? Pay for specific seats.”