I ended a relationship with my girlfriend a few months ago, as long distance was taking a toll. She’s moved to England.

We still keep in contact, and talk often as good friends through text, or phone, and the emotional distance has allowed me to work on myself and be in a much happier mindset.

I’m not sure where the friendship aspect will lead. She’s stated that we are done in terms of a relationship.

In my gut I feel like I should visit her and I really want to see her (even if just as friends).

But I’m not sure if that’s a good move, or whether she’d even want to see me.

How do I bring this up with her, or should I discard this idea from my mind?

Unsure Ex-Boyfriend

Give the idea some space. Casually mention soon that you’d love to travel some time this year, and possibly visit her in England, but you have no particular time in mind yet.

See what kind of response you get, and don’t push it.

If she’s open to it, ask in a couple of weeks when it’d be convenient for her. If she stalls you or gives you a negative response, drop the idea.

Perhaps if you stay connected, in time she’ll let you know she wants to see you again, too.

Two years ago, my wife's son returned from living abroad with his new wife, and moved in with us while they established themselves here.

Since then, they’ve lived rent (and utilities) free. We’ve been happy to support them, but recently learned that they’re planning to purchase a second car when our daughter-in-law passes her driver's license test.

We think that a second car and the very high cost of insurance for an inexperienced driver are expenses they can ill afford.

We also consider that doing so, when they don’t contribute to household expenses, is taking advantage of our generosity, which is not limitless.

They’ve talked about getting their own place, but haven't made any tangible steps in that direction and we suspect they’ll not be able to afford to do so if they buy a second car.

Please advise a tactful way of dealing with this issue without alienating them.

Delicate Situation

Either you let them take advantage by saying nothing, OR you speak up clearly, which is what I advise.

Otherwise, you and your wife are going to resent them, and tensions will develop if they purchase the car and stay with you a lot longer.

Be parental and say that you strongly advise against the car purchase as it will interfere with their ability to move on, which is something – and you must say this – you all want to happen for them to live independently.

Suggest they put the amount that would purchase a car into savings, and start looking for an affordable start to having their own place within the year.

You must be very clear at this turning point.

By the way, they may argue that they need a car for her to get a job, or a better job, etc. to save for a home. But many couples get by with one car and car pools, plus it’s still unfair when they aren’t contributing anything towards food, rent, and utilities…. unless you can easily afford to support them and don’t mind.

Obviously, that’s no longer the case. And they should be mature enough to know and accept that.

I'm a Grade 11 high-school student, who became close friends with a guy this summer. Then we had a bad argument.

Since school started, I've seen him around the halls and we made eye contact. But once I saw him talking with one of his friends, a girl.

His hanging out with other friends and not with me really hurt.

I guess it’s because he said we wouldn't be able to have as much fun together as before. Seeing him with others really stung me.

I asked him on Facebook if I’m still annoying him. He insisted he’s not running away from me, but he is.

Hurt in High School

Don’t lower yourself asking what you’re doing wrong (nothing!). He’s involved with other friends now. Period.

Some high school friends are very loyal, others “run through” many friendships and relationships.

What’s important is your own self-confidence. Spend more time with people whom you trust and feel good about.