My daughter smokes pot with her friends and boyfriend. They tend to smoke at night before they go out, while they’re out and when they get home. And sometimes they smoke on a weekend afternoon, when they have nothing going on. These “kids” are all in their mid-20s, so they’re legal and adults.
I’m not judging them; I smoked pot when I was a teenager for about a year. I didn’t really like it, mostly because you never knew what kind of feeling you were going to have. My understanding is that now, you know exactly what you’re purchasing, in terms of a relaxed high or a fun high (according to my daughter). And it’s now so easily accessible and legal.
But what I can’t get over is the freedom and “normality” of it all. Yes, we all drank before we were of legal age, and we didn’t hide it from our parents. But drugs were always so taboo. Now these kids ask me if I want to smoke with them! They smoke in front of me, at home, in front of their father…. I just can’t get my head around it.
Old School
I think you just need help understanding that marijuana is now a legalized substance, readily available in stores, just like the LCBO for alcohol, or a depanneur in Quebec. It’s a strange concept to those of us over 25, but it’s the new normal.
Sit down with your daughter and explain your perspective so she can understand why you feel the way you do. And then come up with a compromise that makes you both comfortable. For example, if you don’t like it when your daughter and her friends are hanging out at home stoned, ask her not to. If you’re OK with them getting high and then going out, great. Think of it like a pre-party before prom. Different generations need to work together to understand each other and live harmoniously.
I recently realized I’ve been the victim of a years’ long romance scam, and it has cost me dearly. I am a single senior who was very lonely after COVID and signed up with an online matchmaking service. I was liked by a younger, very attractive woman and we continued with texts and phone conversations for many months. Originally, she asked me to send money for food, then money for her family. All while telling me she loved me and how great our life would be together.
I sent her money for travel to see me but there was always an excuse why she couldn't make the trip. Then she asked me to invest in gold bars from her deceased father that were being stored in the U.S. and promised a million-dollar payoff when all taxes were paid and the bars sold.
Sadly, I invested so deeply that I kept going with payments in hopes I would get the money she promised. Payments were made mostly in bitcoin; once a wire transfer. It's obvious she’s not going to pay me back.
I tried an online company to get my money refunded to no avail. When I contacted my local police force's Fraud Squad, I was told that any payments made through wire transfer or bitcoin couldn’t be traced and they couldn’t help me.
Is there any way you can help me get my money back?
Broke and Broken Hearted
I’m so sorry. Unfortunately, no. I can’t help you retrieve your money. But I can advise you on how to notice red flags. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is. If there’s money involved, it’s probably a scam. If you’re still unsure, get a second opinion.
It’s true that recovering bitcoin or wire transfers is extremely difficult once the money has left the country, but it’s still worth contacting the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre and the fraud division of your bank. I’d also suggest reaching out to Victim Services Ontario for support. Best wishes.
FEEDBACK Regarding the language barrier (Oct. 7):
Reader – “Such harassment of that elderly couple is uncalled for, particularly in our society that embraces diverse cultures. We are a nation of immigrants - from Europe, Asia, and all over Africa.
“Yes, the slap is questionable, but the grab, more so. What bothers me the most are the manager’s actions. He may not have seen the grab that led to the slap - but he should have considered trying to find out the circumstances. He should have listened to our writer, which puts him as much at fault as any other.
“Had I been the writer, my immediate response would have been: ‘You don't want my business. That can be arranged.’ And then I'd get his name, and make a formal complaint to the store, and to Head Office.
“I've worked in sales. Being rude to a customer is not the way to enhance business.”
Old Codger