I've been in a very good eight-month relationship with a woman. We're both 40's, divorced with kids.

Recently, she was flipping through my photo albums - fine by me - and saw some photos of me and a then-girlfriend taken years ago. Nothing sexual. She became very upset and thought it inappropriate that I have these photos.

I responded that ex-girlfriends mean nothing to me, but does that mean I should erase my past? The photos aren't out in the open, but in albums I rarely view.

She doesn't like me even mentioning a woman I dated... and I rarely talk about past relationships.

She believes most people would find it "weird" that I haven't discarded all photos of ex-girlfriends. She's done this regarding ex-boyfriends.

Is she overreacting? Other than this, I've not seen any red flags.

Unsure

Maybe you're colour blind. Two red flags: 1) her rush to jealousy and 2) her insecurity/demands.

IF this woman pictured was NOT ever described as your great passion, these photos are innocent and so are you.

Even if you live together, you're still entitled to keep some mementoes - and so is she - so long as they're not in public view or available to the children who'd find them confusing as they adjust to your relationship.

She's wrong, and she's worrisome. Her insecurity stems from other issues than this one, and unless she realizes it, the jealousy and overreactions will occur again.

This morning, I got up at 6:45am and started all the morning chores - letting the new puppy out, picking up all the dog poop, refilling the birdfeeders, getting both dogs' and two cats their breakfasts.

I cooked a hot breakfast for us and finally sat down. My husband got up at 9am and finished his breakfast before me. The puppy started to whine again so I asked my husband to take him outside. He poured himself coffee instead. So I did it.

My husband began shouting loudly at me, ran out into the yard, stripped off his shirt, and threw it across the yard, screaming that everything has to be done on my schedule.

He's nearly 60, doesn't like being given orders. He wanted this puppy and its the puppy's schedule, not mine.

These rage incidents have occurred over the last couple of years. He's never hit me, nor do I feel he will.

Between outbursts, he's an affectionate, normal person. You just never know when the next one's coming or what will precipitate it. He's spoken with his doctor about his "irritability"(!) and had his testosterone levels checked. He's been on a regimen for months, the blood results are encouraging. His health, blood pressure, etc. are excellent. But the rages continue. He never behaves like this with anyone else even if sorely provoked.

The previous incident was only a week ago, they're stepping up in intensity. I asked if he was happy about our relationship and he maintains it means everything to him.

Bewildered and Beleaguered

Get referral to a specialist and insist on having ALL possibilities checked out - from brain tumours to early Alzheimer's. Many conditions have such symptoms, and since this behaviour is a new phenomenon, and increasing, these are strong warning signs. Meanwhile, document the rages - what happens, how long they last, how often, and show them to the physicians and mental health specialists you need to see to track this down. Also, check out any of his medications or their interactions, for these kinds of side effects.

I've worked very hard at my career and have become financially stable. However, my brother has very little money and his new wife overspends for their lifestyle. They have two kids.

My wife and I offered to take their family with us on a Disney vacation, though the cost will be a strain. Later, our father died and left my brother a large amount of money. I now feel I shouldn't have to stretch myself thin if he can afford it. He wants to pay off debts and still have me pay for his vacation.

Your thoughts?

Unfair

Given the large inheritance, he can pay off plenty of debt with what's left from the vacation costs he covers himself.

You did the right thing to offer the trip, but now you should frame it as "good fortune" all around - your two families vacationing together, your brother financially sound, and you not over-extended.