My brother and sister-in-law rent a cottage for two weeks every summer about 25 minutes away from our cottage. My husband is a teacher so has the summers off and I’m semi-retired and can work remotely. All this to say, we basically move up north all summer.

I love that my family is close by and look forward to their arrival. I usually invite them over for dinner the first or second night they arrive, depending on what they prefer, and at least once more during their stay. We also pick them up by boat and do day trips together.

This summer I have a sore hip and am having trouble with my mobility. It’s been going on for a few months and my whole family is aware. But at no point have they said anything about inviting us over for dinner! Am I expected to do what I’ve always done even though I’m compromised?

Reciprocity

No! Of course no one should expect you to continue at your usual pace when you have pain and mobility issues. Perhaps you could avoid the upset and contention by grabbing the bull by the horns. Call or send them a nice email expressing how excited you are for their arrival and the chance to spend time together. Apologize that you probably won’t be inviting them for dinner unless you can order in because of your hip, and you may not even be able to boat due to the bouncing of the boat on the water.

Hopefully, they’ll take the bait. If not, you can throw an invitation out there, as in, hey, can we come to you for dinner this Saturday?

The goal is to spend the time that they’re up there together, without any resentment. Do what it takes to make that happen.

My boyfriend is OBSESSED with soccer! He’s European (I won’t divulge where he’s from) and lives for soccer. I also enjoy watching, especially when it comes to the World Cup. But I’m NOT obsessed. This whole summer has been about FIFA, FIFA, FIFA. And I completely understand that it’s not an everyday or even every year occurrence, but honestly, did he need to watch EVERY SNGLE GAME possible?

His team has now been knocked out (LISI: Remember I write ahead) and he’s literally depressed. He’s still watching the last few games, but he doesn’t want to get dressed, doesn’t want to socialize, can’t move past this.

What do I do?

Band Stander

Tell your boyfriend to shake it off or not only will he have lost soccer, but he’ll also lose you too. That’s not a threat, but it sounds like it’s your truth. I do understand people’s obsession with sports, especially big events such as FIFA, Wimbledon and the Olympics but there will always be SOMETHING to watch, something to distract from our everyday lives.

There’s nothing wrong with that UNLESS it starts to negatively impact your real life. Talk to your boyfriend. Make his favourite meal. Tell him he can have one more day of sulking and then he NEEDS to shake it off.

FEEDBACK Regarding Drunk Dancing (May 26):

Reader – “I was shocked at how you answered the woman who met someone online and agreed to meet at a bar and the person she met obviously had a problem with alcohol. I would have thought you would have suggested to choose a better place like a coffee cafe or even a library; a place that is safe and not a dingy seedy bar.”

Lisi – When they agreed to meet, she had no idea that he had an alcohol problem; and she hadn’t anticipated a dingy, seedy bar, but rather, a chic, hip locale. She commented on her disenchantment with the venue.

FEEDBACK Regarding smelly senior (May 16):

Reader – “The poor woman may have cats. Cat urine smells so bad because it’s highly concentrated and contains communication pheromones and amino acid. Cat owners can become so accustomed that they no longer notice the odour. One of our attorneys, who is young and beautiful, was about to go to court when we told her to change her clothing because she reeked.

“Maybe the issue could be approached from that standpoint. Perhaps the woman could be gently asked if she has pets. Of course, information should be gathered about a spouse or relatives who could help deal with the situation. Someone should then take the lead in contacting loved ones. I would suggest that it be management or an owner of the facility. If this is not possible, then a kind person from the class should step up and do the right thing!”