I’m beyond sure that my girlfriend and I were meant to be together. Our friends agree.

However, she wants more romance in our relationship, even just “little things.”

But I feel burned out on my ability to romanticize, after several unsuccessful relationships where none of my romantic gestures proved good enough.

I’m at a loss. I know my current girlfriend would appreciate anything I’d do. Yet even after thinking for a long time, I still can't come up with anything.

I’d do anything to get my flair back. She’s SO worth it.

- Desperate-to-keep-her

You’ve lost your confidence, not your flair. Don’t let the past be a shadow on this relationship. Your girlfriend may soon find it too annoying to hang in while you dither about not being able to bring flowers, or serve her a candlelit dinner (even take-out food can be presented in a nice atmosphere).

This relationship is about only the two of you… there needn’t be all those others as a haunting presence on your mind.

It doesn’t take a lot of imagination to call her in the middle of her day, just to say you love her – but it CAN help her see that your focus is on her, and not on your old wounds.

I recently visited my goddaughter and her two children ages three and three-months.

I was disturbed to realize how overweight the toddler had become. I could barely lift her.

I’m concerned that she’ll be socially ostracized and her health compromised.

I learned she’s been eating junk food from an early age. I think it’s used to pacify her, as her father doesn’t want to hear this child cry.

I wonder if I should discuss this with my goddaughter. We’re not close but I keep in touch and see her every few months, bringing gifts and usually taking them out, as a treat.

Also, the child's speech is unclear and her mother seems to be the only one who can understand everything she says.

Since I’m a nurse, my concern is both as a health professional and as a responsible adult.

How best should I approach offering advice to this young mother?

- Concerned

Proceed tactfully and with compassion for both mother and child.

Your goddaughter may be overwhelmed by the second child’s birth. She’s likely relying on fast foods and junk foods for convenience – as so many people do when they don’t fully understand the long-term effects of obesity on health.

Give her the gift of a child-based cookbook with simple recipes, using accessible foods; when chatting or emailing, encourage her about healthy eating and share some easy recipes.

Show understanding for the pressures she’s under, but be positive and don’t blame her for the child’s overweight.

Suggest that her doctor can also give her methods and goals for achieving a healthy weight for her children.

As for the child’s speech, be careful not to be too critical, as it may only be a stage.

Once you get this woman more in touch with health-based information, you could then raise a question about speech clarity, and suggest seeing a speech therapist if it seems necessary.

Recommended Resource: Quick Meals for Healthy Kids and Busy Parents: Wholesome Family Recipes in 30 Minutes or Less From Three Leading Child Nutrition Experts. Sandra K. Nissenberg, Margaret L. Bogle, and Audrey C. Wright.

It offers organizing ideas for grocery shopping and the kitchen, plus suggestions for snacks, feeding picky eaters, and eating out.

I’m 32, feeling my biological clock ticking daily and constantly agonizing over fear that I’ll never have children.

I’ve dated lots, but have never been “in love.”

I’ve been dating a nice man for 18 months. We’ve talked about moving in together but don’t have a lot in common and both wonder if we’re really meant for each other.

Yet we’re very decent and considerate of each other; should we just go for it?

- Ticking

Your “clock” still has at least several healthy years to go, so why risk waking up by then with, say, two babies… and a husband you no longer want? It’s unfair to all of you, especially to the children conceived mostly to allay your fears.

If the chemistry and great desire to be together isn’t there, it’s a lot harder for two people to raise children in a loving, secure atmosphere.

Find the right partner, first.