Like most people, I’ve made various New Years’ resolutions over the years – most of them embarrassingly personal, dealing with the more elusive details of a life lived busily, rushed, and sometimes overwhelmed. Daily teeth flossing, for example, could become as needy of my resolve to be more conscientious, as did showing more tolerance for my late-mother’s phone calls reporting the grocery bargains of the week, all at stores 10 miles apart.

Now, with the hindsight of life experience, the reach of an advice-giver, and awareness not only of deeper truths but also of the greater unknowns, I offer these broader resolutions. They’re meaningful for me, and I hope they’re also useful for you, in choosing your own helpful guidelines for entering 2009.

Ten Resolutions to Thrive (not just Survive):

1. Face the future with courage and creativity, and don't let fear be your guide.

So many of you who seek my advice feel caught short by change, and left confused as to what to do.

Apply US President-elect Barack Obama's mantra, and see change as optimistic, a call to draw on your talents and skills in new ways, starting with an open attitude.

2. Laugh a lot. And see the humour in our own stumbles as a healthy balance to more difficult times when there's little humour to be found.

Experts say a child laughs up to 300 times a day. Some adults don't stop to laugh even once in that time.

3. Greet the people you meet day-to-day with a ready smile, unforced politeness, and respectful patience.

There's fury and outrage in many people who write to me about relatively minor grievances they have with co-workers, neighbours and acquaintances. Yet impatience and irritation are harder on the giver than the receiver. So it's to your own advantage to lighten up. Yes, even with telemarketers.

4. Indulge every child you know with excess encouragement.

Self-confidence is an essential ingredient in their healthy development into adulthood. This is shockingly apparent from the vast amount of mail I get from troubled adolescents and teens who lack self-worth, and who feel powerless when they get into relationships, often with controlling types.

I have many children in my life. I've learned that it's important for close people to offer the gift of listening to them, rather than always teaching, and the gift of experiencing music and leisurely reading outside of school.

And beyond all toys, the gift of helping them know nature around them, and imaginative play.

5. Okay, let's all floss regularly, use a gum-stimulator, learn how to make tofu taste less like cardboard, and consider the small, but mightily immune-boosting blueberry, as a best friend. Lesser-known pomegranates are health promoters too; never mind that they're messy to open.

Since there's no escaping it, better to embrace the need to learn about treating the body we've been given with knowledgeable care, good nourishment and healthful movement. There's only one body per person.

6. View spontaneity as a present of time and inspiration, and not an intrusion.

A change in plans, a sudden encounter, a different locale… too often, they're met with rejection, as we too often cling to routines, and deadlines.

Time stress ties us to old thinking and rigidity; while spontaneity can free and refresh the mind.

7. Admire lovely things without an accompanying need for possession.

Oops, I guess that includes shoes…

8. Learn and care about the environment as much as about the economy.

Next food shopping day, add up the number of items you've bought that are in sealed plastic containers and bags. Where does all that waste go? And who convinced consumers that we couldn't wash our own lettuce any more?

9. Focus your mind on the things that matter. If some of these present problems to you, resolve not to be held back by a tendency for denial, or by excuses.

Instead, look for solutions that work and be open to compromise.

10. Cherish the people you love every day, in every reasonable way. And don't feel awkward, or wait too long, in letting them know you love them.