My mom instilled a love of music in me. She listens to music all the time, in her car, at home, at work, whenever. Her taste is mainstream, but it’s what I grew up with, so I love it.

I’m now in my early 20s and enjoy going to concerts. I can afford to buy my own tickets, so I go often with friends. Recently, a band she loves was coming to town and I thought it would be fun to go together. I got us tickets and off we went.

For whatever reason, every time I stood up to dance or get excited, she would pull me down to my seat. I found that frustrating but that wasn’t the worst part. She had to use the washroom twice during each set – and insisted I walk her there and wait! I think we missed half the show!

Fast forward a few weeks and she’s just asked me to take her to another show that I was already planning on going to with some friends. I don’t want to be mean, but I don’t want to go with her. What do I do?

Rocked Out

It’s very sweet that you and your mom have something you can share. I understand your frustration, however, so I suggest you tell your mom that you are already going with friends. But, if she can find a partner (your dad, a friend, whoever), you can all go together. Then purchase two tickets for her and tickets for your friends together.

When she needs to use the washroom, her concert partner can take her. And when you and your friends all stand up to dance, she won’t be able to tell you to sit back down. And, you’ll still have the experience of sharing the music together.

My son has been away for a few weeks, taking a course for next school year. While away, he met some new friends, which I’m so happy about. I’m not enamoured with his current social group as I think they are looking for mischief whenever they all get together.

I know they’re of age to try new things and push boundaries, but I worry about my son. He’s not street smart or that savvy. So, I was excited for him when he chose this program that none of those kids were attending. And he told me he made some nice new friends.

But now he’s home and he’s very secretive about this new group. How do I find out more about what’s happening?

Mischief in the Making

I feel like you should back off a bit. Obviously I’m not fully abreast of the mischief you’re concerned about, but by forcing his hand, you may push him further away.

However, you could ask him to invite over a few of his new friends for a post-travel BBQ in your backyard. Make a delicious dinner and listen to the stories of their travels. After you’ve met some of them face-to-face, you may worry less.

I have one other thought, which is that perhaps your son has a girlfriend (sounds as though it might be his first) and he’s too embarrassed to tell you, talk about it, bring her over, etc. The only way you’ll find out is to ask him, “Hey honey, were there any nice girls on the trip? Did you get together with any of them? Are you still together, or was it just a trip thing?”

If you’re casual, then your son will hopefully be casual. If you’re uptight, then your son won’t want to share with you. In my opinion.

FEEDBACK Regarding dinner diners (June 8):

Reader – “The equally likely outcome is that the people who had to endure the bad behaviour of these teenage morons will never return and will not recommend the restaurant to their friends.

“I once was seated next to a table of 30-something men who were loud and used foul language. I’ve never been back. There’s nothing wrong with telling badly-behaved customers, especially if they’re unschooled teens, that they are disturbing others and need to tone it down.

“And yes, management needs to show some smarts when it comes to seating. In a nearly empty large restaurant, a middle-aged couple was seated at a table immediately adjacent to my husband, myself and our two very young kids.  They complained and he seated them elsewhere as he should have done in the first place.  It was a trifle embarrassing, but I understood; I would have done the same.”