My sister and I are both in our 20s, and this is the first year that we are back living at home together since high school. I’m so excited about it, thinking it will be like when we were younger. We also have a younger brother who just started Grade 12, so we are all home again – for this year.

My sister and I used to walk home from school together, or sometimes we’d just all meet at home for dinner. She dances and my brother and I play hockey so sometimes we’d only meet up at night. But she and I would always have an hour minimum of chatting and giggling daily.

We’ve all been home together now for about a month, and my sister just isn’t the same. She still dances but not as much; and I still play hockey, but only recreationally. I like to go out at night and have fun, even if it’s just for one drink, or to a friend’s house to watch TV. I invite her all the time, but she never seems to want to join. Some nights I’ll hang out with our little brother, playing video games and she doesn’t want to join us either. She used to love video games and especially because she was better than both of us!

Everyone loves her, my friends all love her, and everyone wants her to come out on the weekends. But she just isn’t interested and stays in her room. I’m worried about her.

Something about my sister

There is definitely something going on with your sister and I believe you have reason to be concerned. Have you spoken with your parents about it? I get the impression that you were home last year, and this is her first year back. Going on that notion – and forgive me if I misunderstood – maybe she’s just having an adjustment period to not living on her own. It’s difficult to go from being fully independent to living under your parents’ roof – and rules – again. Especially as a young adult.

However, from your description, she seems sullen and depressed. That’s not a diagnosis, just an observation. You didn’t mention whether she had to come home for financial reasons, or social reasons or employment. Talk to her. Tell her she can talk to you – about anything and you won’t judge. You just want to see your sister smile again. If she refuses to open up to you, and your parents can’t get her to talk to them, she may need professional help. It’s never good to stay bottled up.

While sitting at home, watching TV last night, my whole house just went dark and shut down. EVERYTHING just turned off. I walked around the house, saw that it was also happening at my neighbours, and wondered what was going on. In about three minutes, it all turned back on.

But now I’m anxious to get on my flight next week. What if that happened while flying?

Flying Fears

The black out in your neighbourhood was probably some type of Hydro glitch. You said it was a few other homes and only lasted minutes.

Airplanes don’t run on that type of power, and they have back up if something malfunctions, and back up for the backup. According to my research, a complete shutdown is EXTREMELY rare. And if it does happen, the plane won’t just plummet out of the sky. It’ll start to glide and still be steerable and controllable.

You may need some anxiety medication. Talk to your doctor. (I get anxious flying too).

FEEDBACK Regarding the door-to-door solicitations (June 9):

Reader – “The last 20 years of my career have been as a professional fundraiser.  I can only guess that charities are finding that mail and email funds raised are dropping.  I loathe the return to door-to-door solicitations.

“Throughout my career people have said to me ‘I couldn't do what you do.’ They don't know what I do, because their idea of fundraising is solicitation. In my career, I have worked with so many wonderful, generous donors to discover what is meaningful to them and the impact they want to have with their giving. That is NOT going door-to-door asking for $20 and trying to upsell that to a monthly gift. This door-to-door trend is taking fundraising back 30 years and denigrates the work that professional fundraisers do every day to support their causes.

“No one is obligated to speak with anyone showing up unsolicited at their door.”