My wife brought home a single long-stemmed rose that her boss gave her for Valentine's Day. Seeing my displeasure, she told me that he gave a rose to each of the three women who report to him.
Although I’m not suspicious of their relationship, I said that his gesture was inappropriate because she’s married and he crossed the boundaries of a working relationship.
I’m hurt and angry that she brought the rose into our home to display. My wife sees nothing wrong with their behaviour.
Am I overacting?

- Sour Valentine

Get to a florist. You sound like a man who neglected to buy his wife flowers on Valentine’s Day, and then felt upstaged by her boss.
Even if this is not the case, you’re sulking about this innocent gesture shows a meanness of spirit.
Your wife was pleased to be acknowledged by her boss; he used a popular holiday to brighten the day of several employees. But you cast a dark shadow on the day, and her good feelings.
A bouquet of spring flowers, and an apology, is in order.

I’ve gained 15 pounds since my wedding eight years ago - I've had two children and I'm not considered overweight on the BMI (Body Mass Index) scale.
However, I think it’s changed my husband's view of me. He never initiates sex, and sometimes turns me down. I discovered his porn stash.
He speaks condescendingly to me, saying that my world is small because I’m not as educated as he is.
He originally accepted that I’d want more than two children; now, he says I should earn a degree and find a job instead of having another child.
When I ask, "How was your day," I’m greeted with a grunt or silence. I feel neglected and regret marrying him.
However, he's a wonderful provider and a decent father.
Do I earn a degree so I can stand on my own and leave him eventually? Or do I stay and be unhappy for the sake of my children?
I think it's a woman's right to intimacy in a marriage, not just sex, but a little conversation.

- Lonely Wife

You have work to do, and I don’t mean a job beyond the one you have at home. You need professional marriage counselling for both of you; the immediate tough task is to convince your husband of this.
If he refuses, go yourself to help decide your future as you wish, and not as he dictates.
This is NOT the time to have more children, as you can’t be sure the marriage will last.
Furthering your education is useful and empowering, but first think through an overall plan.
Since you mention the weight issue first, I advise you to start a gentle exercise regime like walking daily, and cut down on fatty and high-sugared foods, for better health.
But don’t let the relatively small weight gain cloud the serious issue of your husband’s distance and rejection. Losing 15 pounds won’t make this marriage perfect, but taking more control of your life will help you decide how to handle it.

I’m 28, in a good marriage, my husband is 30; I have several gay male friends. My hubby has no problem with this.
I’ve been getting closer to one man – he’s great, funny and smart. However, he’s made it known that he finds my husband attractive.
My friend isn’t a touchy-feely guy; yet, as he interacts more with me and my hubby together, he’s starting to try and touch my hubby. He sits close to him, rests his hand on his back, etc.
Hubby just automatically steps away when his comfort zone is entered. I know he’s straight, so no worries there.
However, I'm worried about my friend, who’s lonely. If he ever made a move on Hubby, that wouldn’t be acceptable to me. I don't want to lose a good friend but I also don't want to write off or allow these actions to grow.

- My Gut Feeling

Handle this as you would with anyone – female or male, gay or straight.
Tell your friend, gently, that his behaviour is worrying you, both for your sake and his. Say how much you value the friendship and don’t want any misunderstandings; perhaps he doesn’t realize that his show of affection makes you uncomfortable.
He may go cool for awhile, but it’s up to you to reassure him of ongoing friendship from both of you, as pals.