Do I live on a different planet from everyone else? Am I the only one feeling the economic crunch and pressures of increasing inflation coupled with stagnant incomes? My family has had to go without some luxuries this year, and when I say luxury, I mean ordering in Chinese food. We’re fine, not struggling horribly, not going to lose our home – but we are feeling it.

And yet, when I bumped into a friend at the grocery store the other day, she told me about her summer plans to travel to Croatia, while one of her kids is at sleepover camp for those two weeks, and the other is going up to her parents’ cottage WITH A NANNY.

Another friend of mine, who also sends her kids to public school, works full time, as does her partner, and lives in a modest home, just told me that her whole family (of five) are travelling Greece, Crete and Turkey for a month this summer! And a co-worker of mine just told me how both her kids go to sleepover camp for a month, each at a VERY hefty price tag.

What am I doing wrong?

Can’t afford

I don’t know how you spend your money or don’t. Which means I can’t tell if you’re doing something incorrectly or not. What I can tell you is that you don’t know what other people do with their money, or how they come about it. Perhaps the first family you mentioned has inherited money, since their parents own a cottage. Maybe the parents offered to take the grandchild but chose to hire a nanny to help them out. Maybe they gifted the Croatia trip and paid for camp knowing they couldn’t watch both kids for those two weeks.

As I say, you never know what happens in people’s lives that they choose NOT to share. What I do know is that you can meet with a financial adviser, make a fun plan for next summer, and save your pennies.

Look to your left and you’ll see the world’s first trillionaire. He’s probably hanging out with the millionaire celebrities. Now look to your right and you’ll see someone sitting outside your local grocery begging for a buck. There will always be those who have more, and those who have less.

I’m beginning to see signs of cognitive decline in my husband, but we don’t have the kind of relationship where I can just tell him. He’s a very proud man, with little room for vulnerability and self-reflection. He would find my comment to be a criticism and would immediately get defensive.

However, lately, he asks the same question repeatedly, especially if the subject matter contains dates, times or details. He has also left the house without his keys, his phone and/or his wallet, and has been forced to return, making the outing take twice as long.

My biggest concern is that he has repeatedly turned the kettle on for tea – and then left it bubbling away incessantly before someone else notices. What do I do?

Losing His Mind

Your husband needs to see his doctor as soon as possible, and he may need a cognitive assessment done. Not to say, “I told you so,” but to get him the help he seemingly so desperately needs. Not all mental impairment is irreversible. You didn’t mention your husband’s age, or what caused this change.

For example, in elderly women, dehydration and urinary tract infections can represent through cognitive issues. Antibiotics and hydration can reverse the problems.

Suggest to your husband that he should see his family doc. If he balks, explain why you’re concerned.

FEEDBACK Regarding boring in-law (April 24):
Reader – “Wow, I never thought I’d have such a similar experience. But mine was with my step-mother-in-law. I tried so many ways to have a conversation with her. But her responses were one-word. I finally just gave up. After 10 years she was the same.

“It’s been 40 years and I’ve never had a conversation with her.  She was the same with our children, her grandkids. So, my advice, ignore him.”

Reader #2 – “Another possibility is that his brother-in-law is neurodivergent and is a person for whom social interaction doesn’t come easily.  My daughter is married to a man like that - funny, kind, and engaging with her, but quiet and reserved with the rest of us.   We have come to understand that he is ‘wired differently’ and we accept his social awkwardness.  It's quite endearing and we don't try to force social interaction beyond his comfort level.”