I live in a 55-plus building and a few of us ladies are trying to get a Mahjong game going. The problem is, there’s one lady who wants to play but she’s a terrible player. I have tried encouraging her and even tutoring her, but she just won’t put in the effort to try to get better. How do we politely exclude this lady from our game?
Bubba wanna play
I have a better idea, because you and I both know that it’s unkind to exclude people and you wouldn’t like to be excluded from anything yourself. I have two action points for you: First, go big(ger)! Invite MORE people to play so you have two tables going at the same time. Obviously, put this woman at the other table. That way she still gets to play, doesn’t feel excluded, and you can maintain your kind heart.
Second, offer a Mahjong class to anyone in the building who doesn’t know how to play or who would like to get better, and invite her to join. Again, you’re not singling her out, and you get to show off your skills.
I learned how to play this summer and won my first game! Bam!
I retired at the end of June, 18 months ago. I spent my summer up at the lake and enjoyed my time golfing, relaxing and playing with my grandchildren whenever they were there. I spent the next few months socializing, hiking, biking and travelling with my wife, my children and some friends. A few short trips.
Then we went to Florida for three months for our first attempt at being snowbirds. We had plenty of visitors, and several of our friends snowbird nearby. I took advantage of the weather, relaxed, swam, golfed, but it was a very quiet few months. Even before I left, I knew I couldn’t do that again.
Spring was new as a retiree, we did some more travel, did some work on the house and the cottage and it was soon summer. Summer and fall passed like the last ones, very enjoyably. But now it’s winter, it’s cold as heck, it’s dark and gloomy and I’m miserable. My wife keeps giving me the arched eyebrow that mutely says, “I told you so.” But there’s no way I could have spent another three months in Florida. I feel as though I would die younger there but look good doing it.
Seriously, I’m in a funk. Suggestions?
Snow Bored
You seem to really embrace the seasons, which I love and try to do the same myself. Yet you haven’t mentioned any winter activities. Have you thought about spending an extended period, say one month, somewhere in the mountains? You could ski or snowboard, or, if those aren’t your activities, there are fabulous hikes, cross-country skiing, even skating trails to explore. You sounded active from your email, so I’m assuming you’d be capable.
And if it’s not something that appeals to your wife, perhaps she could go to Florida for that month.
However, if you’d rather be somewhere warm, just not Florida, there are plenty of places where people snowbird. Try California’s Palm Springs or Palm Desert; Arizona’s Tucson or Scottsdale; even Costa Rica or Mexico. And you don’t have to commit for the entire season, just check it out for a few weeks.
Whatever you do and wherever you go, remember that you deserve to be happy and having fun. You’ve put your years in, and now you’re retired. Enjoy life however you see fit.
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