I know that a man I love doesn't love me. However, he'd introduced me to his family last year while we were going through an on-off relationship. Since then I've been part of their family functions: Christmas, birthdays etc. I'm now close friends with his cousins, sister, and brothers.

Initially, everyone thought I was his girlfriend. Later, we clarified separately that we're just friends. But it wasn't difficult for them to recognize that I loved him. They've told him I'm "perfect" for him.

He doesn't like his family pressuring him. Yet he continues inviting me to family events but keeps his distance.

We've been "friends" for six months, no longer having any intimacy. But, on weekends I'm always with him and his family. If I don't mean anything to him then why does he invite me? Is it just guilt because I don't have any family here and I'm a family-loving person (I have a ten-year-old son)?

I'm finding it very difficult to move on, just because I know I slept with him in the past. Now, I think all guys come into your life just for sex; I can't trust any guy.

I don't feel like going anywhere except with his family.

I'm often teary and emotional. I need some clarity.

Confused and Hurt

I'll be clear: You're obsessed with this man. Having been intimate with him, you wanted and expected more; he didn't. Though the early relationship brought you into his family, to him, it's just a way of keeping you as a "friend." But to you, the constant connection is becoming self-deluding, even emotionally harmful.

You go there with unrealistic expectations, and come home disappointed, and building hurt into depression.

For your son's sake as well as your own wellbeing and future, stop clinging to false hopes. It's time for you to seek other friends, too. You can meet his relatives separately when he's not around. Hanging around him won't make him love you.

I separated from my wife of 35 years two years ago. She's been living overseas since. I'm in an 18-month long-distance relationship with a lady living in that same country. If we were both here, we'd be living together by now.

I've been meeting her by traveling over there every four months. We're in contact almost daily.

My relationship with all my ex-in laws is excellent. I've been invited to an ex-niece's wedding to take place next year in that country. My four sons, who know about my relationship, will attend.

I'd like to ask if I can bring my new partner to this wedding but I also have mixed feelings. I'd like her to be involved in my social life, but in this case I'm worried that she'll be the centre of attention at the wedding, and I don't know if this is right.

Wedding Dilemma

The easy part: Ask your in-laws how they feel about your bringing along a new partner. They may prefer you don't bring her for the very reason you suggest, they may first ask your ex-wife how she feels about it, and/or they may say okay.

The harder task comes when you're visiting where your girlfriend resides, and perhaps have to explain why you're going to a wedding with your ex and sons present, and not bringing her along. Hopefully, she'll accept that this was not your decision. You'd be wise to plan ahead for a romantic getaway with her after the wedding.

My husband is very giving of his time to do menial tasks - especially for his father. Unfortunately, his father is sometimes rude and unappreciative in return.

How can I support my husband and what can I say to help him feel less hurt when his father treats him so badly even when he rushes over to help him?

Sad for Him

Your husband knows his father better than you do; this is likely an old pattern between them, something he's had to handle all his life. As a wife, it naturally hurts to see your spouse treated this way, but it's not really helpful for you to make an issue of it.

Only your husband can come to terms with setting boundaries, deciding when the requests are too many, or the rudeness unacceptable. Discuss it but once, with compassion rather than annoyance; he may see that he needs to speak up.