I've been in love with a close friend of mine for four years.
She doesn't know this. She's been involved in a couple of relationships during that span, which have gone bad.
She's "back on the market" and I'm dying to tell her my feelings; I'm 100% ready to do this even though my confidence is a bit shaky.
I only have one fear... that I might risk the friendship I have with her. I don't want to lose her, but I also can't sleep at night, tossing and turning, thinking about her.
Every time I see her and especially her smile, my stomach cramps. My brain tells me that if I do this it'll be all over...but my heart says " roll the dice."
What do you say?

- SLEEPLESS IN CHICAGO

If you don't get some sleep, your brain and your heart will both be too tired for you to carry off this discussion, without pushing or sounding desperate.
You've already gone past the point of deliberation: You need to tell her your feelings while you're still clear-headed, so you can deal with whatever happens next.
If she responds unconditionally that she doesn't feel the same way, it doesn't have to mean the end of your friendship, IF you can handle the truth and carry on.
You may need to take a little distance; you'll certainly need to date others, but you won't have to stop talking to each other.
On the other hand, no risk, no gain. She may just surprise you with interest in seeing where a new relationship with you can lead.

I'm a product of totally different backgrounds, Indian from India, and Hungarian.
My father committed suicide, and my mother remarried. I'm mad at her for kicking me out of the house at age 17. But now I see why. I was told to do basic household chores, but I chose to live outside with my friends.
My sister, 13, followed suit.
My mother had to open her place of work at 5:30 am, then run home to get us to school, then go to another place of work.
My sister and I went out and left the baby alone. Mom thereafter took the baby with her, to sleep on the cement floor in the back of the store.
My sister frequently made my mother go out looking for her at 2:30 in the morning, on a school day.
Now, I have a case of depression. I have two very young children. My mother is not allowed to see them because my husband refuses to let her.
Is this the same as what happened with my father?

- Depressed

Do NOT leap to conclusions about your father's suicide, as there's obviously more to his story than you know.
You're feeling guilty for your past behaviour, yet much of your teenage rebellion was a natural reaction to your father's death, to being uprooted, and to the turmoil of the time. You need professional help, fast. I urge you to call your local distress centre helpline when feeling low; trained personnel can support you through a desperate mood and help you seek ongoing therapy.
Your family doctor can also help.
Since your husband appears to be controlling, he might be less reactive to your having a medical checkup (in which you can privately discuss your depression).
• Search for the closest distress centre, by looking in the Yellow Pages.

I'm in my mid-30s, without children yet, but hope to have some.
My husband feels that it's careless to speak to children, because they should be taught not to speak to strangers.
I only address them after I've spoken to their parents and I never ask their names.
Your opinion?

- To Speak or Not

You and your husband clearly want to be great parents, since you're already thinking ahead. My advice is to remain just as thoughtful, but don't get hung up about heavy-handed rules over such issues.
Yes, children should not drawn into conversation, alone, by total strangers. But when with parents, the adults set the tone.
If a parent worries about why you, a stranger, have started to chat, he/she should keep the child aside, and hurry on. But if the parent is comfortable with you, then sociability is also something that children can learn from an innocent exchange.