I’ve gone beyond my limits to try and make my girlfriend of one year happy. But for several months, I’ve felt more like a lap-dog than a boyfriend.
If I do something wrong, I apologize, but she scolds me, goes quiet and makes me feel like I have to run after her, and beg.
Rather than us working on it, I get the quiet shoulder, so nothing gets solved.
She’s not said she loves me, though I’ve said I love her.
Her previous untrustworthy boyfriend is reflected onto me, though I’m faithful.
Our sex life dwindles with each passing day. I feel belittled.
I’ve said I’m unhappy, and she does try to make things better, but things revert to how it was.
I know she cares about me a lot, but maybe I’m the one who’s lost interest.
I don’t think I can handle it anymore.

- Troubled

The “lap-dog” feeling is your signal to go “walkies”… away from this girl. She’s not trusting enough to have a healthy relationship, and uses pouting, bossiness and distance as controls.
Tell her you’ve had enough of empty “talks” and reversals to the same-old pattern. Do NOT hang on under pressure from her.
You both need a clean break – YOU, to hold onto the Love word until you meet someone who respects you as an equal; HER, to learn how to work through problems rather than rely on passive aggression.

In six years of knowing my fiancé’s parents, his mom’s never asked me a personal question beyond, how was work. They talk about themselves at family functions.
Initially, I was upset, now I’m just sad because both my parents died and most people find my life interesting, since I’ve been on my own since age 14.
I expressed my feelings to my beau early on, as he was unaware that he needed to stand up for me. He’s asked them to ask me questions, but they seem to forget. I retreat to talk with the younger set.
Recently, his mom got angry that I didn’t thank her (which we both did) and at some past “sins” I’ve committed, and now I’m “not welcome” at family events, meaning holidays and birthdays.
My beau said he’ll be spending less time with them because I’m also his family. He still visits them, as we live in the same town. He’s 50, I’m 48.
I told his mother that she appears uninterested in me - she said I was being overly sensitive.
I know I’m putting my beau between a rock and a hard place. What should I expect (reasonably) from his parents, from him, and how do I best deal with it all?
It’d be a first marriage for both of us - but I’m stepping back.

- Sidelined in San Diego

These potential in-laws have pulled out the big guns of exclusion, and “beau” has to face them down.
This is now a showdown between parents and grown son, not a matter of asking politely, nor for you to do the ordering of a new regime. He must say that he’s chosen you to be his wife, he’d like to have them share in your life (on occasions), but it has to mean a welcoming relationship in which they treat you as family - including you, talking to you, showing some interest in you.
However, on the “what’s reasonable” question, you need to also work at this, by finding time alone with his mom, opening up to her, and seeking some common ground.

My mother recently had a big dispute with my husband and me, and has indicated that she’s through with us. We’d go most weekends to help her with things, but it never seemed to be enough.
How do we handle this situation? Or is it over?
Her name-calling of us, is the worst. What should we be doing?

- At A Loss

With so little information, I can only gather that you’re dealing with an aging, angry/frustrated mother who wants attention as well as help.
Her negative language may be part of her inability to cope, perhaps mentally as well as physically. Get her to a doctor for a health check-up, as part of showing you care, NOT because there’s something wrong with her. Say that you want her in your life, but the name-calling is unacceptable.
Then visit, talk with her, and listen, too, rather than just do chores.