I need a holiday. I know, first world problems, but I’m exhausted! I’m a single parent, with one child, and no partner. I have a sister who is helpful when she’s around, but her family just moved away for her husband’s work. Our parents live here, but they’re getting on and have never been interested in my child.
I work long hours in a stressful job to make money to give my child everything possible. It’s now summer and I’ve organized a few weeks of camp, plus a two-week holiday together. We have loads of fun together, but my child is still young and fully dependent on me, therefore a holiday together is not a holiday for me.
I just need to recharge. Do you have any helpful ideas?
Run Down
I have huge respect for you for doing everything on your own. It’s not easy, and I’m not surprised that you need to recharge. You mentioned a two-week holiday with your child. Could you make it a day shorter and use that extra day for yourself? I’m assuming you only have that many days holiday from work.
My suggestion is to take a day to yourself while your child is at camp. Put them on the bus, go home and crawl back into bed. Then go to a local day spa. Get a massage, take a steam, sit in a hot tub and just let all your stress wash away.
It may not get your internal battery back to 100 per cent, but it’ll give you some positive feelings and increased mental energy.
My girlfriend had an internship in another country this summer, but due to a medical issue, she had to return home. She needs to recuperate, so she’s spending the summer at her parents’ cottage, enjoying the sun, playing in the water, and relaxing. I’m excited that I’m invited up as much and as often as I want. I’m grateful and will enjoy my time up there. But I was just offered a job, in the city, in my field of interest. At 22, I’m extremely fortunate to have been offered this position. You may have heard that there are no jobs in the city for students this summer. It’s been in all the papers.
It’s superhot in the city but the work is interesting and I’m enjoying it. I’ve been staying out late, enjoying the weather on various patios around town. Some of our friends are in the city and I’ve been hanging with them. The issue is that, when I’m here and partying, I want to have sex – but my girlfriend isn’t here! And up at the cottage, I have to sleep in another room because her parents are there. So, no sex.
How can I convince my girlfriend to come home occasionally? I don’t want to cheat on her but I’m hot and horny!
Just a guy
I’m trying to empathize with you because I also love the sexy vibes of summer. The heat does turn on that sexy switch for me too.
I strongly suggest you speak to your girlfriend. Tell her how you feel. Tell her that you are, in no uncertain terms, horny and want to be with her. Then make a plan: maybe she can come back to the city on Thursday; you two could go out and get sexy; after work on Friday, you could get sexy again and then head up to the lake for some down time. Get creative while you’re up there. Go for a hike and get naked. Frolic in the lake.
Make the most of your time together. Don’t cheat on your girlfriend just because you’re hot. Take a cold shower.
FEEDBACK Regarding the guy repulsed by his gassy girlfriend (April 15):
Reader – “She obviously thought she had found somebody wonderful enough to give herself to him romantically. To judge her so harshly for doing something that every human does?! I think she dodged a bullet!
“If a man can’t even handle a little flatulence, how is he going to weather the storms of life with her? There are much worse things to deal with in long-term relationships than a little flatulence (I should know, I’ve been married for 20 years and have two children).
“Sounds like that gentleman was just a selfish, childish, weak, wimpy, shallow Hal!!! He needs to get a grip. He has completely unrealistic expectations. He doesn’t deserve that lovely lady anyway!
“Good thing she’s O-U-T! The only thing that stinks here, is his attitude!”
Good riddance