I left my marriage because my ex-husband - a prominent, well-liked, professional - had/has an obsession with teen Internet porn.    
      When our son was a teen, he sexually touched my young female cousin. She later told her father. For several years, my son wasn’t welcome in that family’s home, but my husband still visited them regularly.       
      Over the years, I commented several times about his holding young relatives on his lap or on his shoulders. He agreed to be more appropriate.       
      When I left my husband, my family reached out to support him, but not me. I never divulged my deepest reasons for leaving him. He lives alone. I’ve learned that another teenage cousin of mine is staying with him.    
      I’m concerned. I don’t think he’ll bother her inappropriately, however it’s really disturbing me. Am I angry that no one knows his darker side and still don't understand why I left such a “nice” man. Should I speak to him or to her?
      - Worried Ex

Speak to him. It’s already questionable for this teenage girl to stay with a single man in his home; and you and he both know it’s still worrisome, given his current obsession and past behaviour.    
      Remind him of all that he has to lose publicly and personally, should his teen porn habit become known. Stay in contact with the girl so that you can pick up any clues about what’s going on in his home.    
      If your suspicions deepen, talk to her parents. Whatever their perception of him, they have to consider their daughter’s safety first.

My boyfriend and I, both 22, have been together for six months; we’re from different backgrounds but both born in North America and identify with its culture.      
      I come from a large, close-knit immigrant family, extended family members included. Being the first born, they have expectations of my dating someone from my own background to maintain our cultural roots.      
      They don’t know about my boyfriend. He’d like to meet them, despite their anticipated disapproval. My parents will surely try to push me to break up with him. Because I’ve always been the type to please my parents (and others) I feel that it might happen. Though I don't want it to happen!           
      How do I introduce my boyfriend to my parents and deal with their violent objections?
      - Havoc Ahead

Be realistic about what you can handle and what you can’t. Six months is a short time to know someone, even shorter if it’s all about secrecy and focusing on the drama of star-crossed lovers, instead of spending casual time relaxed together and open with friends and family.     
      So consider: At this stage and young age, are you both prepared to abandon your family and try to be on your own together? Not likely.    
      Instead, try to bring this person into your family’s acquaintance, along with other friends from school, work and the neighbourhood, without making a statement that he’s your “boyfriend.”     
      It’s as important that you get to view him within the environment of your family life (which you hope for in the future) as much as that your parents get to know him. If you two are still together in six more months, seek the help of someone respected by your family – e.g. a doctor, a teacher - to broach the subject of an inter-racial union.
      But be sure you can live with estrangement from family before you draw a line in the sand about making your relationship permanent.

My husband and I visit both daughters’ families all together at holiday times. But one daughter’s mother-in-law always insists her son’s family go to her and her son won’t tell her No.    
      Her ultimatum this past Christmas: If he didn’t show up, don’t ever visit. She invited us too, but not my other daughter and her children. I missed seeing one set of grandkids.
      - Unfair In-law

Call this woman well before the next holiday; be friendly and say you’re both in the same boat, both wanting to see all the family and not miss out on anyone.     
      Then ask her what she thinks is fair. She cannot bully you, like her son, and whatever she says, you can challenge with, “Well, that was your plan last year; so this year we’ll switch it around.”     
      Also, trade off holidays … Christmas one-way, Easter another. Some extended families even hire a hall to include everyone.