I'm 23, dating this girl for 11 months. Everything was great, but we were complete opposites. I was easy-going and nothing bothered me, and she was uptight and complained about everything.

Recently, she said we shouldn't be together because we have different "priorities" and when she's finished school she's going back home.

I was heartbroken. Meanwhile, I met a new girl at work - good looking, funny, and easygoing. She has a boyfriend, and knows I have a girlfriend.

But recently she broke up with him and one night after work, we went with other co-workers for drinks. So this girl and I kind of bonded and talked about our relationships for hours and ended up making out afterwards.

I felt like complete garbage after because I still very much love my girlfriend. I decided to tell her two days later, and she was heartbroken, too. She couldn't believe I did it and I couldn't give her a reason. I want to be with her but she's so sad I did this to her, and I feel terrible too.

Also, this other girl from work now really likes me and I can't just lead her on. I've been getting all this advice from co-workers and friends and its all just messing with my head.

Confused

Stop airing out your "garbage" and feelings with everyone... and learn that most people aren't that concerned about you - they just like the gossip.

Think hard about the girl you say you love. Are you so different that a longtime union won't work, or do you balance each other? If the latter, go after her. Apologize, tell her you were hurt by the thought of her leaving, but you've realized how much she means to you and it won't happen again.

Sometimes when two people are both "easy-going," one or the other may act carelessly, as you did with your co-worker. Tell her you made a mistake, likely fueled by the drinks, but you wish to stay on good terms as work buddies only.

A man in our apartment building likes my black leather boots (knee-high/high-heeled). Some time ago, I agreed to let him borrow them for the $25 an hour he offered. He does this weekly and returns them promptly.

Lately however, he suggested that if he could kiss them while they were on my feet, he'd pay $50 an hour. I could use the money.

He's never rude or crude and I trust him. He explained that it's his "fetish" and that he'd always stop if I were feeling uncomfortable. My roommate says this could lead me into dangerous territory.

Is there any harm in catering to his obsession to kiss and fondle my boots, or should I explain that I'm happy with the present arrangement and don't want to be an active participant?

Wrong Footing?

Listen to your roomie, he/she clearly has a foothold on potential trouble ahead. Foot fetishists are NOT normally "dangerous," but you've fudged the line here between his obsession and your part in it. By accepting pay, you're already a participant. Now he's moving you to the next step.

With your desire for cash, what would you do for $100? Let him get naked while he kisses the boots on your feet?

Better to sell him the boots and buy a new pair for less, on sale. That way you'll both get something you want, and you can end this unusual relationship, leaving him to the privacy of his fetish.

I've always compared myself to women who play the same competitive sport as I do. I become overcome with jealousy when they perform well, receive awards, and do well in their lives (school, other sports, jobs, etc.)

It's become an obsessive compulsion to know about their lives so I can outdo them. I realize this is detrimental behaviour, yet cannot stop. How can I learn to be happy with my own accomplishments and life?

Green-Eyed Monster

The competitive spirit of your sport has gotten twisted - perhaps you were pushed too hard when younger. Or you've been made to feel you are nothing more than a performer who must always be Number One.

You need to explore the roots of this obsession with a professional therapist, and learn to overcome it with strategies that make you recognize how unattractive and perpetually dissatisfied it can make you, until you stop.