My parents are borderline elderly; I can see the changes happening. But they are still spry, social, active and seemingly on top of things. Just recently, my dad received a phone call from someone claiming to be from the bank. Trusting and naïve to the scammers out there, he gave them all the information they asked for and didn’t catch on until it was too late.

Fortunately, he was switched on enough to know that he needed to immediately call his bank, which he did, and managed to freeze all his accounts before any money was removed. The bank later informed him that there were several attempts made to withdraw monies from his accounts.

But, of course, the administrative hassle that followed was endless and tedious. I felt terribly for them but couldn’t understand how he had gone down the road so far before figuring it out.

Fast forward a few months and I just got scammed myself. Similar situation, though in this case, I had done the initial reach-out. Somehow, I must have called the wrong number. How a fake number exists in a Google search is incomprehensible to me. Fortunately, the company I thought I was speaking with sent me an email asking if I was logging in from a foreign country, which made me question the person with whom I was talking. They got nervous and hung up.

Now I feel sick that someone has my information. How do I get over this and never let it happen again?

Scammed

I’m so sorry that happened to both you and your parents. It’s an awful feeling, like someone has rifled through your underwear. With your parents, tell them to always say to any unexpected caller like that, that they can’t speak now and will call the establishment back shortly. The scammer will either hang up, give push back, or plead with you. That’s your obvious clue they’re not legit. Someone who really works for whatever company would say OK.

As for your situation, I’m not sure how the wrong number gets on a Google search. And I’m not sure how to know when someone is legit or not when you think you’ve called the right number, and they answer correctly. But the minute you think something is off, hang up and change any passwords you were using. Yes, it’s a pain, but better that then whomever you were speaking with steals more information from you.

Note to all readers: be very certain you are speaking to someone legit before giving out any information, and NEVER give away a password.

It’s my good friend’s birthday and a few of us are getting together for drinks. One of her friends who I am not close with, but is close with a few of the others, was not included. I didn’t set up the group chat, so I didn’t pay attention or notice until the day before.

I never said anything, but I feel badly that person wasn’t included. The birthday girl didn’t mention anything, and this other person’s name never came up in conversation. Should I just let it go?

Excluded

Since the person left out isn’t one of your friends, I would say let it go. There could be a good reason why she wasn’t able to attend, and the others already knew that so didn’t add her; or perhaps there was a falling out; or a multitude of other reasons.

If curiosity is killing you, ask one of the other women – not the birthday girl or the woman who set up the group – about the person who wasn’t there. There are too many possible answers to address here.

FEEDBACK Regarding mean girls (July 16):

Reader – “I was recently interviewed by two teenage girls learning about leadership.  They had very specific assigned questions. One being, how you deal with a difficult person or situation.

“I told them they need to be very discerning about the people they surround themselves with.  Be aware of how your friends treat others.  If your friends don’t treat everyone with compassion, dignity or respect, is this the type of person you want to associate with?

“The oldest said, ‘you just changed my life.’  She was in a difficult situation with some school friends, and I gave her the direction she needed.

“So, my suggestion to the mother whose girls are dealing with difficult girls is to teach them to be discerning.  Teach them to stand up for what is right, what is kind and what is compassionate in every situation that they find themselves in - not just now, but for the rest of their lives.”