My girlfriend of six years broke up with me one month ago, but insisted she had no one else. 

I’d already suspected she was cheating with this new “friend,” and had said so while we were together. I soon heard from mutual friends that they’re now a couple.

When confronted, she said it only started after we split. The problem is that we’re still sharing an apartment lease till Jan. 1, and I feel betrayed every time she walks in the door after sleeping with him.

I want to tell her that cheating disqualifies her from sharing a home with me, but her new man has a small place plus a roommate, and she has all her stuff here (including our bed).

What can I do?

- Miserable

Avoid her. She has a right to stay in the place she’s paying for, but that doesn’t mean you have to socialize beyond a civilized “hello.” 

When you’re home, absorb yourself in a project, a book, a movie. Do NOT discuss her romance, neither to hear her denials about its start, nor to acknowledge that you care any more.

Even if she didn’t cheat, she broke an accepted rule of relationships - don’t sleep with The Enemy, the very person your partner suspected. It revealed her lack of respect for your feelings and what you once had.

She’s just an annoying roomie now, and fortunately, not for long.

I’m 24, and slowly moving ahead in my chosen career, with a part-time job, and an internship; I’ve worked very hard for this and come from people with no money, so getting ahead to make a good income is very important to me. 

I’ve also met a great guy and we’ve been dating for a year; he’s also ambitious and hard working, and very understanding of my long hours. However, he feels the best way to see each other more and enjoy our relationship is to move in together.

When I’m with him, it seems like a wonderful idea, as I do love him. But I also believe this move could sidetrack me from my goals as I’m still just starting to get somewhere, and have no real financial security yet.

I don’t want to lose him, but I also don’t want to have to give up my dreams to keep him.

- Can’t Decide

He hasn’t asked you to give up dreams, goals or work, so don’t exaggerate his request into a deal-breaker. You’re simply not ready for moving in. 

Explain gently that you need to have both feet further inside the door of your career, before you can give enough to a live-in relationship. Your dating can continue as before, with the added knowledge that this guy wants a future with you, eventually.

Ambitions and hard work are admirable; but if you allow them to override all else, you might end up getting where you want to go, feeling empty. So stay the course, but periodically assess the balance in your life - whether you’re remembering to give this guy, and yourself, enough emotional nurturing along the way.

Our daughter, 27, is engaged to a man, 32, whose deteriorating health condition emerged recently. 

He already can’t work, but she’s going ahead. What can we do?

- Worried Sick

Ask her the straightforward questions that help her face the reality of her decision: Can she financially manage this? Can she emotionally handle his deterioration? 

If she doesn’t waver, help her however you can.

My sister-in-law’s husband is a know-it-all. When our two families get together, he dominates the conversations, and thinks his constant jokes are hilarious. 

I’d love to stay home to avoid him, but my wife wouldn’t get to see her sister, and we’d miss being with our nephews whom we love. Any solutions?

- Fed Up

Tell him that you all get together to enjoy everyone’s company, not just his. Be straightforward yet kind…he sounds insecure and needy of attention, and needs to know this isn’t the best way to get it. 

Also, divert from his performance with some pre-arranged group activities. Spend some time in a nearby park, take the kids skating, on a hike, etc.

The sisters can get together sometimes on their own, and your family can sometimes take their kids on an outing, alone. It’ll decrease exposure time to this guy, and possibly send a subtle message.