Dear Readers - I've been publishing leftover questions from my live online chats, at the request of many. For those readers who've wondered why the format differs from my regular columns, it's because I provide instant, fairly brief answers to some 300 participants' questions, within 45 minutes.

Here are some thought-provoking questions and comments about pornography - whether it's a benefit or damaging to relationships (June 22).

My wife's desire for sex has dropped dramatically since she had some health issues. It barely exists at all. When we first dated we had a great sex life, but it's really not very good right now. So porn is my main sexual outlet, and she's fully aware of this. Outside of getting divorced, there's not much else I can do.

You've found a solution, which she acknowledges, and this is fair. However, you hint that this isn't a happy solution, just a practical one. Go with her to her doctor, to investigate other ways to be sexually intimate together.

Since our marital split, so many friends and family have shared their similar suffering of neglect because of porn.

I don't believe that porn is "amoral." But without moderation, it erodes trust, intimacy, attentiveness, and the REALITY of an authentic relationship.

I advise anyone struggling with this to not feel bullied or ashamed about it. You deserve a healthy sexual relationship.

I've watched hardcore porn for years while I was single. Now I'm married to a wonderful person who was attractive in the beginning but she's let herself go. So I'm watching porn again. Our sex life has suffered. Is it wrong to want my wife to look sexy again? How do I broach this subject without hurting her feelings?

Re-connecting with her sexually will make her feel sexy again, but criticizing her appearance will not. Stop the porn, and false comparisons with those body-enhanced women, and tell her you want a healthy sex life with her. Cuddle, have creative foreplay. She'll get sexy.... unless you two have deeper problems.

People should watch porn together to build intimacy. If you're open, honest about it, and aware that it can be addictive, then it's harmless.

Some porn sites do show graphic and violent sub-ordination of women. But porn is a multi-billion dollar industry and most of those women choose to work in it.

Let's have a grown up discussion. I watch porn - moderately hard-core. My girlfriend loves role-playing when I find something I like. It gives us more feisty lovemaking sessions. I do understand women's discomfort with the bodies we see in porn, but that's society-wide, not just on the screen.

An interesting viewpoint, easily justified as you and your girlfriend have a mutual approach to porn. That makes it your business, not anyone else's.

However, you casually dismiss images that subordinate women so aren't dealing with principles here, just your own pleasure. Again, that's your right.

I think we can learn a lot from porn and can help fulfill fantasies.

My wife knew about my "porn" habit before we married and it's turned into something that we share occasionally. There are plenty of how-to videos that help to expand on our experiences and I also try to look for things/topics that will interest her.

My wife initially was shocked at the prospect of watching porn together. Now she sometimes suggests it herself. She even watches it alone occasionally. Am I lucky or what?

It works and isn't a problem, so yes, you're lucky.

Pornographic drawings are the safest form of porn. Nobody gets exploited, injured, or diseased.

Right on. This dates back at least as far as the Kama Sutra, the ancient Indian Hindu text.

I find a lot of porn disturbing - some of the themes are so demeaning. I appreciate human beauty, male and female, and love erotic novels. But watching people have intercourse makes me feel ill or extremely uncomfortable.

My boyfriend wants me to watch with him. I've watched some alone but don't want to watch with him. Is this type of revulsion/jealousy normal? It's not badly affecting our relationship but he gets upset that we can't enjoy it together.

If possible, find a compromise, e.g. watching some soft porn with him, if you can handle it. But if you feel that uncomfortable, he also has to respect your feelings, and watch less, and also stop trying to convince you.