We built a beautiful basement suite in our home for my mother-in-law and discussed respecting each other's privacy and space. After 20 years, she still lives in our home (rent-free but pays $200 per month towards utilities).     
      She was in a car accident several years ago so I cooked all her meals, drove her to appointments, etc. Recently, I discovered that whenever we’re out, she snoops through our personal papers and checks my housework. My husband mentioned this, she adamantly denied it and bad-mouthed me.     
      However, I’d installed a surveillance camera and caught her. She said she was checking on a noise she’d heard. We put a lock on the connecting door; she had a tantrum then blocked me from my laundry room, off her suite, until my husband intervened.     
      She continues with sarcastic remarks and accusations. She’s causing emotional turmoil for us. No other family members are in a position to take her.      
      Now, whenever we try to talk to her, she develops "heart problems,” though her doctor says she doesn’t have any. There are no underlying health problems either, that would explain her behaviour. I’m uncomfortable in my own home and don't know what to do.
      - Three’s a Crowd

Hubby must write out a reality-check for Mom – by showing what her old-age pension plus help from him (say, equal to the cost of keeping her) can pay in rent for her own place in a seniors’ or assisted-living home.     
      Either she honours her long-ago agreement to respect your privacy – and you – or she must move. She may even be happier and more engaged in life somewhere where there’s similar-aged people around, rather than being alone in her suite when you two are busy, or out.
      If she doesn’t move, she should be strongly encouraged to join a seniors’ day care group, community activities, or volunteer, to get out of the house.     
      Meanwhile, get rid of the surveillance camera … it’s as demeaning to you as to her.

When I was in Grade 8, I played on social sites like IMVU and met this guy. We had a puppy-love relationship, but then I was told to stop using those sites. In Grade 10, I started talking to him again.    
      We had deep conversations daily and it became a close love-like relationship. But, he's in another country so it’s difficult for us to really get anywhere, and there’s been a recent month of silence between us.    
      Then, a friend confessed that he liked me, and asked me to go to the Semi-Formal with him. I’m growing a liking for him. Suddenly, an email arrived. Now, what can I do?      
      I'm only in Grade 11. I once said, "I'll love you forever" to him and I don't want to break my word. He’s not had love from others. Whom should I commit to?
      - Hard Choice

Commit to yourself and your right (and need) to make healthy choices. Your long-distance virtual boyfriend shows neediness, which you’re too young and inexperienced to have to deal with.     
      “Love-like” is not mature long-term love and your poor choice here was in leading him on to more than you can deliver.    
      But convincing yourself to “grow a liking” to someone just because they like you, is also a wrong-headed choice, and more problematic, since this guy’s close by.    
      You can accept his semi-formal invitation, but that doesn’t mean “commitment.”  That can only come when you know him – and yourself – much better. The dance is a date, period.

I’ve recently received a Bar Mitzvah invitation for a cousin who’s twice-removed. I never see these people and know they’re only contacting me to get a present. The last time I had an invitation from that family I didn't even receive a thank you for my "donation" to them.    
      Am I obligated by etiquette rules to send a gift if I’m declining the invitation to this party, due to a prior commitment at that time? Is there a way to do this so that there are no hurt feelings?
      - Not Going

There’s little etiquette coming from your cousin’s side, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore your own sense of doing the right thing.     
      Send a note of regret that you can’t attend, with information about a (small) charitable donation you’ve made to honour the Bar Mitzvah boy, as his religious ceremony symbolizes coming-of-age awareness of his responsibility to a community beyond family.