I have decided it’s time to take back control over my body. I know some women just have such an easy time of not gaining too much pregnancy weight, losing it all quickly after the baby’s born, and keeping up with all their exercise routines while parenting infants and toddlers.

I’m just not that person.

I ate whatever my cravings requested while I grew my babies inside my belly. I stopped my usual activities, which included springtime baseball and fall field hockey, and I didn’t bother switching for something more accessible, such as yoga, Pilates or even swimming. Though my babies were born healthy, which I am ever grateful for, I didn’t bounce back. I leaned into their need for me and just lived in the moment.

Now, both kids are in school full time, and I am feeling like I did myself a disservice. I am F-A-T! Is it too late for me? How do I do what I’ve set out to do?

Bouncing Body

It is never too late to take control of your health. I suggest you start with two appointments: one with your family doctor for an overall health check-up; and the other with a personal trainer who can kick-start you into action. If the latter is inaccessible for you, there are multiple avenues of research out there for you.

Start with CHATGPT and explain what you are looking for. Remember that the more specific you are, the better the platform can help you. For example, describe yourself in detail: height, weight, body shape, measurements, and what your ultimate goal is. Also, describe a regular day-in-the-life, when and how you have time to fit in exercise; include your daily eating habits, and any dietary restrictions. And what activities/exercises you enjoy/detest.

Will you be able to reach your goal through diet and exercise alone? Hopefully, but I can’t say either way since I don’t know your specifics.

My nephew is gay and the nicest person you’ve ever met. He’s also very handsome, in my opinion. He came out at 14, but we all knew by the time he was 10 years old. He’s now 22 and has never been in a relationship. I’m worried about him because his mother, my sister-in-law, isn’t very comfortable with his identity and doesn’t talk about anything with him. My brother is accepting, but also not a big talker (no matter what or who, when it comes to sex).

My concerns are that he’s not getting the support he needs and the information and guidance he needs to navigate this path. Whenever I see or hear something that I think is pertinent, I make a point of getting together with him and slipping it into the conversation.

For example, I was watching a show that described different lifestyle activities that I knew nothing about. I learned so much from this show and want to discuss it all with my nephew. Some of it is quite graphic, but very important for his health. Is it inappropriate for me to share this with my nephew?

Caring Aunt

It all depends on your relationship with your nephew and his openness to your information. You may be close as family, but he may still be uncomfortable discussing his sex life. I advise pre-empting your information divulgence with a conversation on what he is and isn’t comfortable discussing.

Either way, make sure he knows that you are a safe space, a vault (unless his safety is at risk), and that he can talk to you about anything.

FEEDBACK Regarding the service dog (Jan. 19; March 19):

Reader – “My daughter became disabled. She was, and is, a huge concert goer. Her and her husband love concerts! She just received a service dog to help her get around and help her live her normal life.

“Her service dog has been trained to go to concerts! To not freak out with the music and to pay attention to my daughter's needs. My daughter can still enjoy a part of her life that she had before. She can't run or do marathons anymore like she used to do. But at least she can enjoy the music!”

FEEDBACK Regarding ME ME ME (March 24):

Reader – “Life happens and I wouldn’t want to be limited to talking ‘about one child,’ if my husband had just been diagnosed with cancer. Why not put a time limit on each speaker?  Perhaps 15 minutes each and use a timer.  Then each participant talks about their issue.”