What should I say to a male houseguest who leaves urine drops on the bathroom floor?

Disgusted

Say, "Here's paper towel to clean up after yourself, including the floor." If necessary, repeat.

When there's a next occasion for that person to stay over, specify your house rules.

However, if it's an older relative who has incontinence or is forgetful, get out the mop and handle it yourself. The relationship's more important.

I'm a Canadian woman who married a wonderful European man. Before we married, he'd always said he wanted to move back to his home country immediately after marrying, and I enthusiastically agreed. We have two children now. His family is wonderful.

Eventually, I became depressed and homesick over the years. He finally pushed for the family to move back to Canada to keep me happy. I'm re-settled with my two kids and found a good job, while he's finishing his employment contract in Europe. He'll likely find a much lower-paying job in Canada, when he arrives next month.

I'm happy without him - reconnecting with friends and old hangouts. I don't want him here, but feel guilty thinking this. He's a good person who encourages my being with friends, girls' nights out, etc. What shall I do?

Conflicted

Play fair - it's the only decent way - both as a model for your children and a payback for his supporting this move back and your need for greater happiness.

Give the re-adjustment one year.... for the kids to settle in a new environment, without also losing their father's presence, and for you and he to find some independence within the family unit.

You may be associating being with him, with your past depression. But your European situation was different - no longtime friends, no familiarly comforting surroundings, cultural, and language differences. You're far more secure now, with a lot more opportunity for time on your own, and with wide support from friends and places. You can well handle giving your husband a chance.

Eighteen months ago, I separated amicably from my on-off boyfriend of five years. I soon met someone new - so different from my ex. I fell in love hard and fast. A few months later he asked me to move to his city and I jumped at the chance.

I'm living a relatively happy and normal life with him, yet can't stop thinking about my ex even though my partner's wonderful in every way. We never argue; he's compassionate, smart, and caring. My ex was wildly creative, but moody, and sometimes quite difficult to be around.

This relationship is easy and comfortable, and my past relationship was passionate but difficult. I love my current boyfriend, yet I have this terrible, guilty yearning for someone who wasn't good for me. How can I get over it?

Mixed-Up Miss

This is about YOU, not these men. Explore your own nature as well as your goals. Many people seek an ideal of peace and harmony in their lives, yet thrive more in stimulating environments.

Sometimes the best balance is a stress-oriented job, and a calm home life, but for others, a relationship with diverse opinions, and new challenges balances a steady work life.

Ask yourself, is this guy "wonderful" only because he's not the last guy that pushed all your buttons? Or do you love him for the long-term and just naturally miss your ex only because you'd been with him so long and he was part of your more familiar surroundings?

My boyfriend's been with many girls but it's because a lot of girls like him. He also has four female "best friends" who are the only people he really cares about. They're really close and hang out almost 24/7.

Is it okay for me to be jealous occasionally, though he tells me not to worry? Two of these best friends are girls he used to like so I'm worried he might get feelings for one of them again.

Unsure

Don't worry, just end it. He may not have feelings for any of these four, but he has no clue how to be a real boyfriend and doesn't respect your feelings.

I'm betting that if he's with them 24/7, there's little time being spent with you for anything but quick fooling around. No time for you as a person. Leave this guy to his posse, and find someone who cares most about you.