My friend lives in an old brownstone-style house, with one front door, a large foyer and stairs leading up to private apartments, one on each of the five floors. Common entry, common staircase. My friend lives on the third floor, an elderly couple live on the second floor and a family with three children live on the top floor. There are a lot of stairs and no elevator.

The main entryway is locked and there is a buzzer system on the side of the front door. Recently, my friend came home to find several large boxes of food inside the foyer. One box had 20 loaves of bread and there were five of those boxes; one box had 50 cans of tinned salmon and there were four of those boxes. Since they weren’t hers, she just walked by and left them.

The next morning, around 6 a.m., her buzzer went off. It was a man asking to pick up the food he’d ordered. Since she was half-asleep and knew nothing about it, she told him he had the wrong number. But this happened a few days in a row. And the boxes changed in size and content from day to day but were still there whenever my friend passed through.

At the end of that first week, my friend arrived home to find the entire entryway packed with people and boxes, so much so that she could barely get to the stairs. As she walked up, she bumped into the mother of the family on the top floor who explained that this was her doing because she is so worried about food and environmental waste.

Apparently, she has joined an app where restaurants, bakeries and grocery stores sell off the food they’re going to toss at a very low price. She had decided to partner with a local grocery store, which is why her boxes had so much quantity of one specific item. And then people join the opposite side of the app and register to come and pick up the food for free.

My friend’s issue is that hers is a private building, not a public one, and there are dozens of strangers inside, clogging the entranceway, but also, with access to people’s homes. How can she get this woman to realize that what she’s doing is a great idea, but misaligned with her living situation? It even states on the site that it’s not recommended for apartment buildings.

Not a Food Bank

In other words, this woman, the mother of the family on the top floor, was trying to do something with good intention, but without thinking it through. Yes, I agree, she was doing her part to save the planet and help feed the hungry. Commendable on both ends.

However, as you say, yours is a private building, home to multiple families, not just hers and the people entering are strangers. I agree with you that it’s unsafe, especially for the elderly couple; and unhygienic - it could invite a rodent problem. I strongly suggest that you show this woman the information from the site and insist that she discontinue this practice. Give her a week to figure out another plan but then talk to your building manager.

Do I need to tip my coffee barista?

Tipping Etiquette

No, you do not NEED to tip your barista. They are paid, like any other employee, a set wage to do their job. In this country, you are welcome to tip them if you so desire.

I don’t appreciate the assumed tip on top of an already outrageously priced beverage; that makes me want to tip even less.

Let me decide when and how much to tip.

FEEDBACK Regarding student stalker (July 9):
Reader – “This rang so many alarm bells. Because the ‘stalker’ is only 14, the writer says they’re ‘not fearful for anything scary.’ Unfortunately, children as young as 12 have been in the news lately charged with murders.

“And this child appears to be aided and abetted by the mother. Triple alarm bells! The writer must speak to the parents now before something terrible happens. If that doesn’t work, she should call the police.”

FEEDBACK Regarding overwhelm (July 11):
Reader – “When my husband was diagnosed with cancer, I joined cancerconnection.ca an online forum for patients and caregivers run by the Canadian Cancer Society.

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