I’m a female, single for four years. I’ve been on many dating websites and find that most single men my age (50) want someone much younger.
Those who are interested in me, turn out to be married.
I got tired of the b.s. so I went to a popular cheating website where the truth is in the open.
I have good friends, enjoy travel, all I really miss is sex. For me, no-strings-attached sex isn’t so bad.
It’s very hard to find someone to keep.
Men are fickle and like to move on, despite that I can be a hostess, I’m pretty sexy, great in bed, etc.
I ask men why they cheat. Some say they’re estranged from their wives, or that their wives don’t want sex anymore.
I don’t know if it’s true. BUT LOTS OF GUYS CHEAT FOR THE THRILL.
True Story
Your findings may be accurate… but skewed, since you’re on a website promoting adultery.
Fortunately for most marriages, a higher percentage of married women and men don’t cheat.
According to figures in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, some 22 percent of men and 14 percent of women will cheat on their spouses at least once during their marriage. So 78% are apparently not cheating.
Meanwhile, many dating websites offer so much choice that women and men alike initially go for superficial traits.
Both focus on looks, men seek younger women, while women seek successful men.
Yet studies show that the majority of couples still meet through traditional dating methods - through friends, at a coffee shop, restaurant, or bar.
My point? Married men may be providing sex. But that’s it.
No real intimacy, no keepers… you yourself feel that’s lacking.
It’s worth a try to inform friends that you’d like to meet someone unattached who’s ready for dating an active, attractive, sexy, mature woman.
I run and participate on an adult men's sports team. I’m one of the older players at 50.
One player, 29, is a good person who really enjoys the sport. However, he’s socially awkward and requires a lot of patience (and easily gets on other players’ nerves).
His teammates are accommodating, tolerant, and kind. He’s not had an easy life, as he lost his father over 10 years ago.
He’s confided to me that he cannot understand why he doesn’t have a girlfriend.
I suspect that a professional would diagnose him as being somewhere on the Asperger’s spectrum.
Is it out of line for me to gently mention that perhaps professional assistance (and diagnosis) might help him achieve his life goals?
I doubt that he’s ever been diagnosed, nor does he realize that he’s socially different.
Volunteer Coach
Gentle and sensitive are the watchwords here. He may know perfectly well that he’s socially “different,” and find it even more awkward to discuss.
Also, don’t mention your suspicion of his “condition” since you might cause him great anxiety and frighten him into not seeking any professional help.
Raise the matter when you’re alone with him, and based on his confession about difficulty finding a girlfriend.
Say that it’s not uncommon for people to need some guidance looking at their own approaches to meeting new people, socializing, and dating.
Assure him that getting counselling to help meet personal goals including seeking a relationship, is not uncommon and can be very helpful.
Ask once or twice if he followed through or wants your help finding a counsellor. Then leave the rest to him.
My drama class project is to write a play, in assigned groups, based on teenagers’ issues.
My group-mates chose depression and teen suicide.
Both subjects are hard for me to deal with because I’ve previously come within one step of carrying out suicidal plans.
I sat through the brainstorming session quietly, but don't think I can get through the project.
The teacher would probably let me skip the research on how it feels to be suicidal, but I can’t handle the annoyingly light-hearted ideas that my classmates have raised.
Can I ask them for a topic change, or ask the teacher to let me switch groups?
Uncomfortable
Privately tell the teacher you have personal experience reasons making the topic very uncomfortable for you. Ask firmly that you switch to another group.
You don’t have to explain yourself to any of the students.
If this has triggered past depression, see a school counsellor or your doctor.
Tip of the day:
If you hope to one day find a “keeper” relationship, dating married cheaters distracts from openness and opportunities.