It seems every day there’s something in the news that’s dark and sad. The war in Russia and Ukraine. The war between Israel and Iran. Three children murdered by their father on his visiting day. A woman drowned after falling off her jet ski. A young boy drowned after disappearing on his school trip. Shootings in Mexico. Planes that fall out of the sky in India. Fighting in northern Nigeria.

I could go on and on. Some days, I can’t get out of bed. I feel the weight of the world’s self-destruction on my chest. Why can’t the news be filled with happy things? Babies born, innovations in health care, innovations in mental health, cleaner ways to create healthier foods, for example.

How can we live in a world full of hate and chaos?

Overwhelmed

Oh, you’ve asked a big question. Yes, I agree, the world is full of darkness right now. This is not an era of contentment and stability, like the 1950s. And though every era has its issues, including the 1950s, right now, today, it does feel as though we are living in dark times.

I’m not suggesting you stick your head in the sand and pretend to know nothing; however, I do think you should take a break from social media. If you are so inclined, choose one world issue that is close to your heart and focus on helping them. For example, when Toronto had a large influx of Ukrainians a few years ago, I was able to give them clothing that was very helpful and useful.

Find your cause and lean into it.

You may also consider therapy – talking to someone about how you feel can be very useful.

My aunt is in her late 80s and loves to look good. She’s still a very tall and formidable woman. She has always had her hair done and never goes out without a full face of makeup. Lately, when I see her, she doesn’t look as good. Her hair colour looks painted on sloppily and her makeup just looks clownish.

How can I help her look her best even though she’s aging?

Glamour Girl

You are a kind and caring niece. Offer to drive your aunt next time she goes to the hairdresser. Have a chat with them about her hair. Perhaps it’s time to let it go. I understand colouring your greys, but at a certain point, white hair is dignified (and from my research, very hard to dye).

Now do some of your own research and find makeup that is created for mature, aging skin. To the best of my knowledge, at a certain point, less is more. Perhaps find a store where they do makeovers and have someone show your aunt how to do her own makeup at this stage in her life.

Then take her out for lunch, listen to her stories and laugh the day away.

FEEDBACK Regarding the fart story (April 16):

Reader – “My husband and I have been happily doing it regularly for 20 years.  During one of our first slumber parties, I woke myself up with a fart. We never spoke about it.  Years later he revealed he heard it. We laughed. It’s a common gag story with friends. Humiliating but funny.  And we’re not big on farting in front of each other still, but when farts happen, and they do, they’re funny.”

Live fast, die old

FEEDBACK Regarding the nail biter (Jan. 30; April 18):

Reader – “I, like the writer, have bitten my nails for most of my 80 years.  I finally managed to stop a couple of years ago; however, I still find myself doing it unconsciously. When that happens, I put the offending finger under a small stream of Grace’s Hot Pepper Sauce.  It’s a desperate solution but it works! It might help others to solve the nail-biting problem!”

FEEDBACK Regarding the couple and their music issue (April 22):

Reader – “You missed an important option for the couple with one reader and one music lover. My partner works from home; I’m retired and love my music. I can’t listen when she’s in a meeting, or on the phone, or when she needs quiet for thinking/writing. Solution? Good quality headphones, which can be had for as little as 50 dollars (and should last years).

“I can happily listen to my music while I cook, do the dishes or laundry, or pursue my hobbies. I have access to unlimited music through my computer, and my Bluetooth headphones allow me to listen and wander through the house without disconnecting!

“Bonus: she listens to books and podcasts with headphones while I watch hockey games.”

Lisi – While I agree it’s a good solution, I find that very anti-social.