I love my boyfriend of three years very much, but I'm starting to doubt that he loves me. He says he does, but some things are bothering me.

He's always said that he thinks it's important to stay fit for each other because he believes that when someone starts letting themselves go, it's because they've lost interest in their partner, and I completely agree.

However, after dating for a year, he cheated on me with a friend. He owned up to it immediately (that same night), he expected me to break up with him but asked that I didn't, and he cut off contact with the girl at my request when I decided to take him back.

Shortly after that, my sister passed away, and the combined depression affected me greatly. I gained 30 pounds.

I've been struggling with losing that weight since, but it's been difficult, and my boyfriend repeatedly states that I'm still overweight. He recently revealed that he wouldn't propose until I'm thin, and if I don't lose the weight, he'll leave me.

Worse, we had a pregnancy scare. I don't believe in abortion, so he said that if I were pregnant, he'd leave me because he's not ready to have kids yet.

If he really loves me, shouldn't he want to marry me more than he wants a thin girlfriend? And if he loves me, then why would his personal freedom be more important than our relationship if I get pregnant? Are there some real red flags here?

Insecure Chubchub

Red flags, alarm bells, and clear messages: This guy is immature and superficial. He loves his image of all that he wants - model-like girlfriend, no kids in the way of good times - more than he loves and supports you as a person and life partner.

You should doubt his character more than his words. His "I love you's" are meaningless - he ignores the force of those two emotional blows (his cheating, your sister's death) and threatens you about your weight! Ask when he WILL want children, because you clearly want them some day. This relationship is already rockier than you're acknowledging.

I'm a well known, well respected, manager of the janitorial department at an established and pristine company. I'm nearing 50 and have been sporting a mustache for 20 years.

I know that people are making fun of me for it - drawing pictures of me with my "thick" mustache, calling me inappropriate "mustached" terms behind my back, and overall just mocking me.

I'm a strong-willed man, but deep down, this might be starting to affect me. What should I do?

My mustache is greying, and I fear that due to this, people are calling me an old, mustached "porn star." Should I dye my mustache just to get the image off of me, or just shave it off just to end all of the pain?

Hairy Matter

After 20 years of this moustache being a part of your looks, and with your solid job, it seems odd that there's now a reaction and rudeness about it. It could be the silliness of one or two newcomers in the building.... in which case you should walk proud and ignore them.

But, if you're sure there's a wider response to the graying moustache, and not your sensitivity about turning 50, try the dye to see if the comments die down. If not, you can try removing it to see the reaction.... and then grow it back if you miss it.

I was dating a guy (my childhood friend) for three years. He's living in India; I'm in Canada. I went to India last year and met his family. Suddenly last fall, he started ignoring me.

He doesn't want to keep a relationship with me, but I still love him and want him back in my life. I want to marry him. Why is he doing this to me, and how can I get him back?

Distraught

Long-distance "dating" is hard to maintain. Though as longtime friends you had memories to share, your visit brought you two together in the present, highlighting your now-different worlds.

Despite a similar background, you're changed in some ways due to your locales. His parents may've influenced him to re-consider the relationship, since one of you would have to move and adjust to the other's lifestyle. Or he decided this himself. Ask him to be clear, it's only fair.