How do I move on after being betrayed by a boyfriend and his mother? On Christmas day, instead of spending time with his new family, he went out with his friends. When he came home, I said that was inappropriate - so he locked our two-month-old son in the bedroom with him.

I enlisted his mom for help but was told I was "overreacting." She allowed him to bring over another girl on New Year's and they "bunked" together, though I was still in their home.

We made many attempts to get back together but it always ended because of my anger against his mom for allowing these things to happen.

She would babysit our baby so her son could go out to bars. I tried to tell the girl that he brought home that day to stay away from my family, but I was seen as controlling!

There are many things that I disagree with in that household and I fear that my son will be influenced by it - we currently have joint custody.

I have a good job and am currently in a relationship with a wonderful man who loves my son and me dearly. I know I don't want to be in a relationship with my son's father. How do I get over all this anger and stop feeling like I'm missing something in my life?

Betrayed

You may be missing the image of a "perfect family scene," since things went awry when your baby was so young that you never had that situation with his father.

And your anger is partly at yourself. That mother and her son had completely different values from yours, and deep down you know you accepted a relationship when you should have moved on long before.

If these feelings of anger don't ease over time, get counseling, or they'll make you distrustful of even small oddities in other relationships.

I'm 60, she's 58. We have a three-year long distance relationship and I believe it's time to take the next step and live together.

We love each other dearly, and have great communication. We spend several days together every three-to-four months. We have a wonderful sex life.

However, we live in different countries and one of us must move. We're first exploring her coming here because of all the good things this country has and we'll never find over "there."

She works there and lives with three of her adult children. She's very attached to them and I believe she substituted the lack of affection from her ex with her dedication to the "KIDS!"

I believe that they, without bad intention, are holding her back. She wants to come and live with me but worries about them and feels she's abandoning them.

I tell her that sooner than later she should retire and the kids will make their own lives, and in the end, she'll be alone. I tell her too, that time isn't on our side. How can I help her?

Waiting and Wanting

Understand her quandary better and show that you truly intend to be a partnership by helping her find a compromise. Example - she moves here but you both visit there for one or two months a year, when you're both retired "sooner than later." Or, you include in your budget the gift of a trip here once a year, for her adult children, IF they can't afford it on their own. There are many ways to NOT "abandon" her family.

I'm a Chinese-Canadian lady, 39, and I'm very lonely in my area on weekends. Some friends advised me to go downtown to find new friends. Do you have some good places for singles, such as dancing, parties, and singles' clubs?

Need Company

Look for new friends in logical and safe places, not just through some vision of a "downtown" weekend party scene. That's where many people who go out, tend to make only passing acquaintance with others, and/or seek one-night stands.

It certainly won't solve your loneliness and provide friendships you can rely on or partners for a relationship. Instead, you want connections with people you can count on for weekend company, and periodic contact the rest of the time.

Singles' clubs in your own area would be more accessible, and likely offer activities on holidays, too. Your own community centre likely has group functions and parties, as would your cultural community.