My friend is so needy of being the centre of attention in a group, that he often crosses the line. He'll say anything that comes into his head, which can include the secret you told him yesterday and he swore not to tell.

He'll twist facts, to enhance his story, but sometimes others know better and correct him.

I have to be careful what I tell him, yet even when he exposes something in public about someone else, I cringe.

Recently he revealed another close friend's past affair, which was long over. However, that guy's girlfriend was in the room and learned for the first time that he'd cheated on his ex-wife.

I don't know what to do. Should I cut off a friend of 20 years? Or tell him if he ever reveals my personal stuff, I'll punch him out!

Annoyed

Forget the punch-out... it'd give him great attention and possibly land you in jail for assault!

It wasn't your story he revealed, so it's somewhat excessive to cut off this longtime friend unless you've decided you don't trust him, period.

However, you can take him aside for a serious wake-up chat. Tell him, he was rude and wrong to shoot his mouth off:

1) He's troubled this guy's relationship, since his girlfriend now thinks he's a cheater.

2) He's disgusted you and made you not want to share confidences ever again.

3) Worse for him - he looks the needy fool, far more than a great entertainer.

Everyone sees that he knows no limits, nor discretion. His stories are suspect, his revelations crude.

Tell him you'd like to stay friends but warn him you can't accept another public embarrassment by him - either about you or anyone else. Another episode, and the friendship's over.

I'm a female and I've been accused of something I can't help. I have this weird little crush on a girl and it's wrong. So I try not to get along with her so I hate her, but then I'm accused of being mean and I don't know what to do!

I can't let go and every time she speaks to me I panic and I look like such a freak. I can't be nice to her. I need to hate her so I don't do something stupid that I'll regret!

Panicked in Birmingham

It's your sexual identity that you're struggling with, and that you need to get comfortable about. It's not unusual for young people to have feelings for people of the same sex. Sometimes it's part of the process of sexual maturation, and sometimes it's how you discover your own sexual orientation. Sexuality usually develops over time; so don't worry if you aren't sure.

If you do feel that you're only attracted to girls it's important that you learn to like and accept yourself and not feel you have to go to extremes such as pretending you hate other females.

You'd benefit from talking to someone you trust about your feelings.... perhaps a school counselor, or older relative whom you believe will not be judgmental.

Most young people, whether straight or gay, experience a questioning and searching period about sexual attraction and behaviour. It's normal. There are many resources online and on bookshelves about sexual orientation.

Read with an open mind, and don't feel you have to fit any rigid labels. There are many sides to your personality - your interests, talents, hobbies, etc. - that are also part of your identity.

I'm 18 and my parents are talking about getting a divorce. I really think they have issues that need resolving but I'm unhappy that they think the only option is "freedom."

I've asked them to go to marriage counselling but it seems my father isn't really willing because he doesn't think it will work.

Is there anything else I can do to push them to stay together, or should I just grow up and let it happen?

Unhappy

It's not your job to keep them together; their decision isn't about you or because of you. For now, they need the role reversal of you showing support that they're adults who'll have to do what they choose.

However, you could simply mention that you understand that counselling helps divorcing couples split up civilly, and to stay connected amicably through their children. Counselling is not just an effort to keep people together.