Tip of the Day Archive
When strongly opposing views on the pandemic’s life-or-death risks become distressing, take a break from contact and discussion.
Helping a friend summon courage to reveal facts that could end her engagement, is kindness. Revealing her story yourself is gossiping.
When a once-close friend’s only greeting is competitive bragging, it’s time to move on.
Dating after years spent in a marriage or long relationship, requires learning technology skills at making new contacts and online assessments.
Sexual fantasies are normal and healthy, if both parties benefit from them.
Besides two sides to every story, readers’ feedbacks provide further possibilities.
In a relationship crisis, silence achieves nothing.
When everything signals a complicated relationship with many stresses, protect your own child, and wait till your boyfriend solves his problems.
Adult children who respect their parents, nevertheless have a right to their own values and beliefs.
Your Questions and Commentaries are why this column will reach its 18th anniversary in September. Keep ‘em coming! Many thanks!
Consider the qualities/values you seek in a partner, then date selectively
Married spouses must be clear about loyalty to their partner, when opposite-sex friends try get “too close.”
Mixed marriages can thrive if both partners show that they equally respect their different backgrounds, customs and values.
Reuniting a marriage after having separated, requires learning new ways of relating to each other, and love.
Anxiety about a health-compromised relative’s exposure to Covid-19 is necessary, not something to argue about.
“Friends-with-benefits” is an arrangement of mutual convenience which often only serves its purpose for a limited time.
Keep reaching out to “detached” adult children through sending regular signs of your caring about them.
Living with intrusive, takeover parents/in-laws puts serious pressure on a new marriage, and may cause its breakup.
Friendship is about caring, and supporting. If you can’t provide these, don’t pretend or protest. Gently distance.
Adult children should appreciate parents’ finding new, healthy partnerships after a loss.
Prejudice, and distrust from family members can destroy a cross-cultural relationship, if you let it.
Siblings may have had different experiences while growing up with their parents, which they don’t always share with each other.
Dating, like marriage, has to be a two-way street.
Ghosting is a cowardly act by someone not worth your time. Never feel that it’s your fault.
Surviving Covid relies on our adaptability and staying focused on getting through it safely, together.
Don’t hide unusual flirty texts from an ex. Discuss them openly with your spouse.
Suicidal thoughts/attempts are urgent cries for help. Call a suicide hotline immediately.
Mental health disorders can tear an entire family apart. Finding the right medication and ongoing professional help for all parties, is crucial.
Relationships need to spring from mutual interest and desire, not with one party withholding a “wait-and-see” response.
Pandemic-period dating can be creative and sustaining, if safety measures are followed by everyone involved.
See a changed family situation from everyone’s view, not just your own, to still be effective as a parent.
Relationships started with “lockdown orders” either revealed the best in a new partner or the worst.
A loss of trust can happen from a seeming-small, foolish decision. Think first before you risk your relationship.
When night terrors/bizarre behaviour occur, focus on the immediate situation and seek professional guidance.
When someone faces danger, trying to help matters.
Dreaming of a past, unfulfilled relationship won’t answer your current questions and hopes. Take the first step toward knowledge.
Labelling relationship troubles as “confusing” is an excuse for doing nothing.
Children of divorce sometimes carry resentment/anger/greed into adulthood. Reach out unless it becomes unbearable.
Divorce in the time of COVID-19 adds stress to stress. Get informed/prepared, unless you/your children need to seek safety first.
Curious about friends’ divorces at 40? Look inward, then talk to your spouse about how you’re doing together.
Been dropped and blocked? Don’t confuse having sex with trusting someone before you know anything much about him/her.
Don’t stand for bullying through a verbal attack. IF you did something wrong, apologize. Then walk away.
When parents “move on” after a loss to another mutually-desired relationship, be supportive.
When a friend’s at serious risk, get involved in helping.
When young adults behave like spoiled teenagers, they’re looking for boundaries that have meaning for them.
When dating post-divorce, reassure children about their priority in your life.
In a relationship, it’s the questions you don’t ask that indicate fear of the answer, also known as distrust.
When healthy young adults overtake their parents’ home and choices, it’s time to insist they move out.
Never accept a partner’s physical abuse as something you deserved. Carefully create a safe, private plan to leave.
A new baby is a responsibility which can be joyous but requires realistic preparation.