Dear Readers: Since the festive season often brings out sparkle not only in a loved one’s eyes, but also in gift boxes of jewellery, I’m publishing your responses to a previous question about jewellery gifts from an ex. “Bejewelled” had written (Nov. 21) that she had several items from ex-boyfriends, but hadn’t told her fiance about them. She knew he wouldn’t want her to wear them; yet she felt some sentimental attachment to them. Here’s what some of you thought about whether to wear, sell, or trade-in the bling bling.

• I think she should tell her fiancé about them and keep them for her children. If he’s that uncomfortable (jealous), she may have to take a serious look at him and decide if he’s a “keeper”. There are going to be many similar issues arise about friends and family (male and female), work colleagues, etc.

Mementoes from relationships will always have some value, and should be kept and a new partner has to be able to accept that.

Otherwise, can the new partner even accept that we have loved before?

A Guy Friend

• Take the items to a qualified jeweller and have him/her remove the jewels. You can design new pieces using them, and you’ve got lovely new jewellery with new emotional significance (your new life) at a fraction of the cost!

P.S. Only involve your boyfriend in the design process if you're sure he's a keeper.

Proud but Wary

• I, too, have jewellery from my ex-boyfriend - a pair of diamond earrings, a ring, necklace and bracelet - however it’s ME who doesn’t feel right wearing them because they remind me of him, which makes me uncomfortable.

I think that some things are acceptable to wear, e.g. a bracelet, but a ring is way too personal.

Diamond Discomfort

• "Bejewelled" has every right to keep and wear the jewellery she’s collected; these items belong to her and her alone, and although her fiancé may request she not wear them frequently, she shouldn’t have to sell or hide them to placate him.

If he feels she should only wear jewellery chosen by him, he’s perfectly capable of purchasing a gift for her, but these do not need to replace what she already owns.

Although I’m generally against keeping (or at least openly displaying) things from exes, items that make one feel special, regardless of origin, are worth hanging onto.

Sticking Up for Owners’ Rights

• I would dispose of the jewellery in such a way that my wife/husband wouldn’t even know it existed.

When true love comes “a-knocking,” there should be a desperate need to make that person feel as comfortable as possible that she/he is the one and only.

If you don’t feel this way, keep looking because you haven’t yet found the right one.

For The One

• Her previous relationships have helped to mold and temper her to become the woman this man has fallen in love with.

By putting so much emphasis on the jewellery, he almost sounds insecure about the relationship and distrustful of her.

Selling the jewellery for new ones or other items seems like a mutually beneficial way to deal with this predicament.

Analyze

• A good compromise would be to have the stones re-set into one piece of jewellery - perhaps a pendant for a necklace. Rings have too emotional a meaning.

Practical Girl

• Not being honest/upfront about the jewellery and trying to deny its sentimental value is what would bother me.

Worse Mistake

• When I first got together with the woman who recently became my wife, she was up-front about keeping a pair of diamond earrings from her previous boyfriend, but not for sentimental value.

I gave her nicer diamond earrings as a wedding gift, and joked that I couldn’t have her wearing another man's diamonds down the aisle, and we both got a good laugh out of it!

Happily Married

• She should hold off wearing the jewellery until they’ve been married for a few years. By then he should feel more comfortable with it.

Plan Ahead

• Relationships are complicated enough, without a constant reminder (jewellery) that your partner still has some attachment to a past love.

Not Confused.

• “Bejewelled” seems a first-class drama queen - making this a way bigger thing than it is.

So, she’s MARRYING this guy, and is having a hard time being honest about something so trivial as this?

Why risk making him upset and jealous?

Unimpressed