I've been divorced for over a year, and have been dating a woman for a couple of months. Recently, she was talking about her last sexual encounter, making fun of how small the guy's manhood was.

My own manhood is well under average in length (three inches long when erect and like a woman's thumb in girth).

What am I to do about it? I've previously had women laugh out loud at it! In hospital, I even experienced nurses snickering and looking at each other when they saw it while not erect.

Embarrassed in Florida

A woman who mocks a guy's manhood to another, is not a promising lover in her own right. She's insensitive, crude, and gossipy. Drop her.

Size may matter to you more than it will to a decent woman who truly loves you, since experts insist that it has nothing to do with virility.

It's what you do with the equipment that counts, and there are many ways to be sexy and satisfying to a woman, at any size.

However, your anxiety about this should be addressed by first talking to your family doctor.

Beware of the many unsubstantiated commercial claims about penis enlargement through pills, creams, exercises, etc. Penile enlargement surgery is widely considered of uncertain value and sometimes dangerous. Since every surgery carries risk, do thorough research on the methods and past results before even considering this route.

My husband never loved me. Our marriage was kind-of arranged. Now we have three kids at whom he always yells. He has thousands of rules for the kids, and me but always finds excuses for not following the rules himself.

He always threatens the kids, "Okay, you don't have to listen to me. Wait until some guys from outside the house beat you up. Then you will learn." He talks to them about our eldest child or me in a sarcastic way. He has no friends. When I once filed for divorce he accused my friends of teaching me to expect a happy and relaxing life.

But we're still together for our kids. I'm not sure if that's the right choice. When I sent him the letter regarding divorce, he told my friend that he'd take one of the kids so he didn't have to pay so much child support. He's always mad about me spending too much money even when I got clothes from a garage sale or second-hand store.

Then he vents his anger to our oldest daughter, picking on her, and yelling at her. He sometimes even said to the kids "I'll beat you even before the policeman comes."

We did get some counselling. But it ended either because he didn't want to spend more money or some other reasons. What should I do?

Staying for Kids

You and your children are being emotionally and verbally abused, and, especially in your eldest daughter's case, this is an unhealthy environment that could impact far more seriously than a divorce.

Your husband has also threatened physical violence, for which you can get police involvement and a restraining order if you again seek a divorce.

However, you first need a plan to assure your safety if you decide to leave him. Talk privately to a lawyer to understand your rights. Then contact an Abused Women's organization or other community agency that can help with working out how and when you would leave with all of your children, where you'd live, etc.

I work with someone who's become a good friend and seeks contact with me, but seems uncomfortable with physical closeness, i.e. normal conversational space. Why would this be?

Confused

You and I both need more information in order to consider the possible reasons. IF you don't have a personal hygiene problem, IF there's no sense of sexual tension between you, and IF he doesn't back off when talking to anyone else, it's still a mystery.

You could ask him directly, but you may not like or be comfortable with his answer. He's possibly more attracted to you than you realize or than he wants to show. He may have a jealous partner and is careful to put up boundaries with female friends.

Yet his behaviour is at odds with being "a good friend." Instead, it feels insulting. So, either confront him (which could end the friendship), back off from frequent contact, or try to ignore it.