At 19, I married  my father's cousin, after a long-distance relationship; he emigrated here a year ago, works full time, I’m in college.  
      He has problems with my parents. On Easter Eve, he refused to wear a suit to church; my father heard me getting mad and intervened.
      I’d wanted him to wear a suit  because I was wearing a fancy dress and it was our first Easter together. Afterwards at dinner, my father made a small sarcastic remark about my husband's shirt, he took it too seriously, lashed out and left the house, thus ruining the occasion.
      Later, my father got verbally angry with him. They exchanged mean words and won’t talk to each other. Now my husband wants to move but we’re not financially ready. How do I bring back the harmony that our family once had and get my husband to respect my family?
      - Worried

Respect has to be a two-way street. However, you and your family thought you could transplant this man into your parents’ home and lifestyle (in which you’re still immersed), without his having a say of his own.
      Perhaps in his home country men don’t always wear a suit to church (especially if it’s hot at Easter). Perhaps he likes his own style, or is trying to assert himself in your relationship, as wanting to do some things a new way.  
      Your father was wrong to intervene over a minor matter, even more wrong to make a sarcastic remark. None of you have shown your husband respect as an individual, or as an equal half of your union.
      Unless you all treat him differently – and recognize that moving out is a good plan when possible -  he’s likely to move on his own one day.

My brother’s wife is the only one who doesn’t seem to know that he’s an alcoholic who’s in complete denial. Eight years ago he hit a man while driving after consuming alcohol, and killed him. His wife was the only one who believed that it was the man who crossed in front of his car, causing the accident.
      Due to depression from the crash, my brother got off with a large fine, suspended jail sentence and 10 years without a driver’s license. His drinking resumed after his court case. He became self-employed but it all started again, his employees dropping him off at bars every day, while they did all the work.
      His wife works till 9pm so he was usually asleep when she arrived to him describing his “exhausting day.”
      She’s fallen out with people who approached her about his drinking. But I’m concerned that he has his license back after six years (he appealed) and is drunk-driving again.
      Worse, he’s now driving his son, age eight.
      I know his wife wouldn’t allow it if she really knew.  He’s begged us not to tell her. I don’t want to phone the police, but who’s he going to kill next? How do I reveal the truth to his wife?
      - Danger Ahead

Better to save a life than a friendship. Alert his wife to the truth. Ask her to go home early one day to surprise him. Warn her that she’ll feel guilty the rest of her life if she ignores your message, and her son or anyone else gets hurt.
      If she refuses to listen, alert the police. You’ll be ultimately doing your brother a favour, especially if he’s forced to get alcoholism treatment.    

While in a vacation town I’ve visited before, I learned that a local resident, whom I’d gotten to know a little and like, had suddenly lost her husband. I knew this would leave her in difficult straits. Yet, I didn’t make a condolence call.
      I was there on holiday recuperating from my own illness, and just didn’t bother to make the short trip to her place. Then I bumped into her on the street, and my negligence was obvious. How do I handle this now that I’m back home, thousands of miles away?
      - Regretful

Send a condolence card and your sincere apologies. She has more on her mind than your social neglect, and will still appreciate sympathy at her loss. Explain your illness – but only briefly, this isn’t about you. Contact her again a short time later to show that you’re thinking of her and not just about your own embarrassment.