My husband of three years and I don't have sex often and I can't understand why. It's been a problem since Day #1, but when we do have sex, it's fantastic.

We're both busy, don't have kids, but have date nights, which should bring us closer. Yet when we get home, sex doesn't seem to be on the table.

We're both in love, healthy, and attractive, but I feel ashamed "asking for sex" after being rejected so many times because "he's tired."

I don't think he's cheating, nor has an addiction, nor has poor body image or suffers from any medical problems. I think we're in an early rut together, and I know we have to talk. But what do I say that doesn't sound like blaming, nagging, or begging? How do I protect my feelings of self-worth throughout all of this?

Cold Bed

Sex can be "on the table" - literally - or after your morning showers when you're wide awake, or in the shower, and it's all worth trying because that early rut of yours is just too established to ignore. And it'll only get worse if you have babies, or more demands at work.

You're both currently committed to a lifestyle that doesn't allow for spontaneity - too busy, too fatigued, and/or out on pre-planned dates. You need to mix it up, stop waiting for him to initiate or you to ask, and just get on with creating moments for love, passion, and sex.

So.... have a gentle talk about how you believe this is important to keeping intimacy in your relationship. Just saying, "I love you" isn't enough for healthy young people who need to bond physically often enough to keep the emotional attachment strong.

Then start finding those fun, spontaneous windows of opportunity, and introduce play into your organized lives.

If all that doesn't work, it's not about begging, but about confronting the elephant in the room; you'll both need an answer to WHY he avoids sex, when there's time and place for it.

My mother's really bitter towards her parents. She tells me stories about how rude her mother can be, and how her father didn't care. My grandfather's passed now, but I want my mom to have the good parental memories that I have.

She feels her parents never loved her enough as she was. They thought she was fat, or ugly, and told her so. My grandmother forces her opinions on others and doesn't listen. But my relationship with her is totally different from Mom's. I live with my grandmother in the city where I go to university.

Two of my aunts feel the same way as Mom. One even warns her friends about her mother's rudeness. During weekend visits, my mom's always looking to "stir the pot" and argue with her mother. What can I do for my mom? I don't like to see her like this.

Disturbing Dynamic

Visit Mom back home when you can, since she clearly comes mostly to see you. When she's in your grandmother's home, get her out with you, introduce her to your friends, take part in the universities' weekend events, and keep her busy.

You can't change her unhappy memories. But you can boost her enjoyment and confidence levels, by showing your love and support for her. Do NOT get involved as a go-between trying to repair their relationship. It may never happen, and that's not your responsibility.

My fiancé's two younger sisters had an enormous fight recently. It was so bad that one didn't join us for a family dinner, because the other would be there.

She thinks we're on her sister's side, even though they were both invited. She gave an ultimatum, saying that she wouldn't come unless we "uninvited" the other, which we said we couldn't do.

I don't want us to take sides, and we both see the validity of their arguments, but how do we stay neutral without angering one or the other?

In Between

Rise above this squabble. Tell each sister that you and their brother love them both, and therefore cannot take sides, and can only wish for them to come to some compromise solution.

Try to see each of them separately during this tension, but when there's occasion for a get-together, still invite both. How each responds, is her own choice.