I recently reconnected with a guy whom I’d briefly dated 10 years ago. We started off talking casually, and became friends with benefits. We met for sex once. After that, each time we make plans, he cancels at the last minute.

When we’d first talked casually, I told him I had feelings for him. He said he wasn't ready for a relationship.

We then went ahead and had sex, but I still have feelings for him and want something more. He knows that.

He hasn't texted me for a couple of weeks. I'm not sure where we stand and what to do next.

Friends or Feelings?

His cancellations and silence are sending you a strong message: He doesn’t want a relationship, and doesn’t want to mislead you any further.

His initial response to have sex with you was thoughtless and self-serving, since you’d admitted having feelings, which he clearly didn’t share.

You were only friends with benefits once. He hasn’t treated you decently as a friend ever since.

He did show some guilty conscience about it, by backing out of plans. But now he’s stopped texting so that you’ll stop expecting anything from him.

Gather your pride and end all contact. Even if he knocks on your door again, it’ll be another one-off for sex only because he’s lonely or bored. Don’t answer.

Friends-with-benefits only works when both people like and respect each other as pals, but understand there’s nothing more than a sexual connection.

Don’t demean yourself by hanging on for something that’s not there.

My story may save some of your readers some grief.
The night before our father died, my sister went to one of the financial institutions that our parents had used.

She emptied the safety deposit boxes of most of the valuable assets.
Although we both held equal powers of attorney, and though both of our signatures were required, a clerk at the branch allowed my sister access.

Some 95 percent of the family jewellery disappeared, among other items of high value.

After our father's death, we attended the branch together. When the boxes were opened, they were essentially empty.

My sister insisted that she’d not removed anything. When asked, by the manager of the branch why she’d opened the boxes, her response was: "They let me.”

All of this was said with a blank non-descript look on her face.
Warning to readers: Pay attention to the lifestyles and attitudes of your siblings.

Many people are living miserable lives. Their only focus is greed, thinking that newfound wealth will buy their own family back.
My family and I will get on with our lives and continue to interact in a positive manner. But she’ll have to look over her shoulder, as her children hover, and behave similarly to her, like vultures.
By the way, stupid me... she’d previously done the same thing with another family member. She was already a multi-millionaire, with no financial worries.

The Other Sister

How sad for you, to experience such unabashed greed and indifference in your sister, twice.

Should you consider taking any action, talk to a lawyer about her arbitrary removal of legacy items, when you had equal POA. And question whether the bank’s security cameras filmed her removing things from the security boxes.

Your acceptance of what happened is admirable, yet I believe you must still be hurt.

You might benefit from talking to a therapist if this also reflects your earlier sibling relationship, to heal any past emotional wounds.

I’m a bright, articulate, and competent mature female student who returned to University. I’m loving every minute except for:
1) A fellow student who contradicts everything I say in class (I’m sure of my facts).

2) A fellow “team” member who intervenes with:
“I want to make things easy for you,” or
“It looks as if you’re having difficulty/problems/trouble with that.”
3) Instructor who ignored repeated requests to explain her marking, and withheld some assignments and marks until the last minute of the course

Student Stress

You’re articulate and competent, so speak up and show it:

To the contradictory classmate, respond, “I’ve spoken facts,” and cite your resources. University is meant to be a place of healthy debate.

To the “team” member, “Thank-you, but I can handle the work.”

See the department dean to ask about the policy regarding marking systems. Also ask about reasonable expectations regarding receiving assignments and marks.