My wife and I have had a rough first two years; we’ve had the police show up twice and I’ve been charged once. We don’t treat each other with respect and we’re constantly arguing. I’ve gone to therapy many times, and feel I’ve changed a lot. But my wife feels she has no need for help, and believes I’m the only problem, when it’s clear to everyone around us that’s not the case.
We have a daughter, eight months (planned) and my wife is pregnant again (unplanned). Whenever we argue over anything, small or not, she says “DIVORCE IS INEVITABLE.” The thought kills me: we’ve come such a long way; we have a house together, and a family. I don’t want to lose them.
My parents say divorce, but I can’t justify it, there has to be something I can do.

- Dying Inside

A family is worth trying to keep intact… until its dynamics become destructive.
This is still an adjustment period; the family’s future not yet doomed. You say you’ve changed but she hasn’t; yet the reality is that her life has changed dramatically with pregnancies, motherhood, and a new lifestyle.
Yes, she’s part of the problem, but she may also be overwhelmed by these changes and having difficulty coping, plus not knowing how to react other than through anger and blame. Try becoming her teammate, perhaps more than you already have.
Pregnancy is a sensitive state, so reassure her of her attractiveness; help out with your daughter as much as possible, and if you can afford it, get her some outside cleaning/babysitting help so she can have time for herself.
If nothing moves her to less outbursts and threats, consider the impact on your kids of growing up in the midst of this hostility between parents. In that light, divorce (with fair custody and access arrangements) doesn’t look so wrong an option.

My parents and younger sister (33) sold their house while awaiting their new one. They stayed with us rent-free for “two months,” agreeing to help with utilities (they’re all employed) but stopped during an added three months.
They also stopped paying for their share of the cleaning service. My sister lied to me about their final closing date, and then they left me with a mess.
At Christmas we went away but I called and told my sister we’d be returning earlier than planned. When we arrived home, my dad vented all his frustration at me; I suggested he could leave. I apologized at my mom’s request, but he continued to insult me before my sister and mom.
Apparently he was partly upset because my sister didn’t report that we were returning earlier. I feel used and hurt. I want a relationship with my mother but I feel like the outsider in my family.

- Alienated

Sis is the pot-stirrer of a competitive sibling relationship here, which I suspect is not new. Living with your parents makes her the closer one, but your hospitality seems to have moved her to distance them all. She’s likely unaware she does these things but it maintains the status quo she enjoys.
If you want family harmony, you’ll need to accept this family structure; besides, it appears you’re the luck one with your own home, husband and ability to be generous. Put this incident behind you, and remember its lesson: When you take in family members, there are bound to be relationship issues. Be prepared for them, or find another way to offer help.

My boyfriend of two years and I moved in together last fall; I’m 43, he’s 54. We mostly have a wonderful time together yet we’ve had sex once in over 18 months. I’ve attempted to initiate several times.
I’m attractive, in shape and desirable; he’s on blood pressure medicine and drinks beer daily. He won’t take the medication he was given for erectile dysfunction.
No, he’s not gay.
He says his disinterest has nothing to do with me, and he’ll change. Should I leave?

- A Good Woman

If you want sex, leave. You accepted moving in with him during this problem, so he’s had no reason to change or work on resolving it.
However, if you’re happy enough with his companionship to drop this as an issue, and see if, when the pressure’s gone, he might become more interested, try it. After a few more months, you’ll know the answer.