My husband left me for a co-worker; it was humiliating, devastating and traumatizing to my children and me. They don't understand why he did this to us because he was devoted and loving. I finally let the pain go and found a gorgeous amazing “moral” man whom my kids adore.    
      My co-worker’s having a “fling” with a woman he’s mentoring. It’ll soon be an office joke. I’m a friend with this guy, his wife and their children; I don’t understand, as they seemed to be very much in love. I think his actions are selfish and pathetic. I can hardly look at him or the other woman without feeling sick to my stomach.       
      Should I send a message anonymously or go directly to these two sluts, telling them the cat’s out of the bag? Or should I anonymously let his wife know, so she can move on with her life and find a more deserving man? My guy has lots of wonderful guy friends whom he said would love to meet her.
      - Fighting for Fairness in Love

Fight by example, not with a Big Mouth. Your life is now happy, yet your letting past hurt and resentment move you to dump pain on others. His wife may already know, or have reasons why she’d rather not know, so your little bombshell could be tossed back at you for nasty meddling.      
      If you once had a real friendship with the husband, you could talk to just him, privately, saying that everyone’s aware of this affair, and you’re hoping he’s thinking clearly, even suggest that he seek some objective counselling before this explodes publicly.  The “moral” thing to do is NOT tell his wife. Consider, too, that this liaison could just be flirting, and not the affair you’ve latched onto as your personal cause.

My son-in-law made a pass at me and my daughter, 23, blames me, saying I should’ve done something to stop it. He’s verbally abusive to her, manipulative, controlling and a liar. She has a son, 3, from a previous marriage and is afraid to fail at marriage again. She won’t talk to me or let us see our grandson.      
      Initially, he called me 1-2 times monthly, just general chat, then, more frequent and more personal calls. What scared me was when he said he wanted me. Over 50 calls within four days; only four were answered so I could record them.     
      But my daughter’s decided to make a go of it with him and has completely shut out her entire family and old friends.     
      Police have been contacted, harassment charges filed, and I contacted local resource groups for abused women. How do I get my daughter and grandson back in my life when she won't talk to me?
      - Wit’s End

Stay alert to her situation, as best you can, but don’t pressure her to leave him. She’s likely under great personal stress, or deluding herself, and will only push you away further.     
      Periodically, send a note, or somehow get a message to her, that you’re thinking of her, miss her, and would love to see her and your grandson (outside her home), and you promise to not talk about what happened.    
      Do this whenever you can and be a good listener. She’s young and under his control, but over time will probably open up to you. If not, keep trying to maintain contact with the boy, by offering to baby-sit whenever needed, sending gifts for occasions, etc.

I was widowed 18 months ago after enjoying a beautiful marriage for 62 years. Am I old-fashioned and wrong to feel a tiny bit hurt because I never receive any mail addressed to Mrs. (husband’s name)? That is a title I was always proud to have.
      - Lost Name

You’re naturally missing your husband and seeing the changed name as part of your loss. However, some mail is likely being addressed to your own name now, by people who are caring about you and trying to be sensitive to your feelings.      
      For close people, tell them that you prefer to see your late husband’s name. Explain that it’s a link that’s meaningful to you. For official mail, you can call or write the organization or agency, and ask that the other name be still used. But be aware that there may be some administrative reason why some use your own name instead.