My son came home with a puppy last week. He says he found it on the street while walking home from school. I have no reason to doubt him, but…. it seems odd that a lost puppy would just be roaming the streets. I’ve taken it to the vet to check for a chip, but the vet says there isn’t one and that the pup is still too young anyway. I’ve posted it in our neighbourhood chat and on a lost pets page on Facebook in my area. No one has reached out.
We weren’t in the market for a new puppy; however, our dog is getting on in years, and this little guy has cheered him up over the past few days. He’s put a spring in his step. I can see that my son is falling in love with the puppy, and I admit, I am as well.
But I’m nervous someone is going to come forward. What do I do?
Finders’ Keepers
You are doing all the right things, by checking for a microchip, taking the pup to a vet, and posting on social media. Sadly, it is a possibility that someone just dumped him, or that he escaped from his home. If he’s too young to chip, he may have only just come off weaning. This puppy needs love and care. If you’re willing to take him on, get him properly checked out by your vet, and then chip him when he’s old enough, if no one has claimed him.
I imagine that if no one comes forward within the month, you’re safe to call him your own. However, you never know. Hilary Stanton Zunin, the author, once said, “The risk of love is loss. The reward is everything.” I’m a dog lover, so I think it applies here nicely.
When my cousin was younger, he fell off a horse and broke his back. He has been a paraplegic ever since. It was the worst-case scenario for all of us because we were an extremely athletic, outgoing group of boys (we were nine male cousins in a 10-year age range). He wasn’t the oldest or the wildest, but he was the most fun. The accident sucked all the joy out of him for a long time.
About eight years later, I met a woman I knew would be perfect for him. But I had no idea if she would date a guy in a wheelchair. And she was interested in me. I took her out on what she thought was our second date and told her about my cousin. I could see she genuinely felt compassion for him, for me, and for everyone touched by the accident. Then I told her I wasn’t interested but thought she should date him.
At first, I think she was offended, but I must have known something because it’s five years later and they’re engaged. My cousin is joyful again, and complete. So, what’s my problem? I’m second-guessing my decision and wondering if I’ve lost the best person out there.
Love Lost
You decided after one date that she was perfect, in your opinion, for your cousin. And that you weren’t interested. I agree – you must have known something because they’re happy. You’re a good guy for looking out for your cousin’s interests.
And she may very well be a wonderful person. You’re just having a moment of self-pity because you haven’t found your “perfect” person. Yet. I imagine one day you will meet a woman who is perfect for you. Be patient.
Had you liked this woman back then, could she have been your person? Maybe. But you’ll never know and you can’t go back to find out. Move on.
FEEDBACK Regarding the distraught husband (Jan. 13):
Reader – “You correctly advised this fellow to seek counselling. But is there more? My take is that he is probably 60-ish, perhaps retired, less accomplished/successful than his wife and has now developed a huge resentment against his wife's success. He has a real problem. I hope he gets some help before he ruins his wife's life any more than he already has.”
FEEDBACK Regarding frugal wife (Jan. 22):
Reader – “I also think HE should look in the mirror. What exactly is stopping HIM from taking HIS children out to buy new clothes or get haircuts or to do some grocery shopping HIMSELF?
“I am also questioning if his wife is trying to send him a message? What has he been doing during the decade that they’ve had two children?
“Before she seeks medical attention, I think some couples counselling could be a better start. He sounds somewhat controlling.”