Dear Readers - Part Two of your many heartfelt responses to the January 9th plea of a struggling single mom of three children, to learn that she wasn't alone and has hope for a better 2012:

#1-I was a single mother with three small children and a full-time job (often not the best-paying job).

This mother's obviously suffering from being overwhelmed, and depressed - she needs to get help for that. The Salvation Army (or her own church) will help her get the kind of help she needs and direct her to social services in her area. They'll also help her find ways to upgrade her skills.

If the children are old enough to go to school, they're old enough to help a little in the house. Teach them to hang up their clothes, make their beds, and give them scheduled chores according to their age. Make games out of tidying up the kitchen, washing dishes, etc. That's also a great time to talk with them.

Regarding making sure the children's clothes are clean in time - plan their school outfits on your day off. I washed t-shirts, blouses, etc. by hand in the sink because I didn't have a washer. Sending children to school in their sleeping attire only makes them the butt of jokes among their peers.

Make inexpensive meals on the weekend that you can reheat on workdays. Don't be afraid to buy bruised vegetables, cut off the bruised bits and they're great in soups, stews, and pasta dishes. Really cheap cuts of meat can be used if you cook them slowly on a low heat.

Play board games, and take the children to free activities. Join Parents without Partners as they provide outings and activities for kids.

Most of all - emphasize education! The only way out of poverty for children is to ensure they get the best education they can.

When they're older, they can earn a little money babysitting, cutting lawns, watering plants, etc. in the neighborhood.

My reward - my children are well educated, have great lives, and are very close to me. They recently said they never knew they were poor when they were growing up.

#2-Her story sounds very similar to that of the mom of my "little sister." She wanted her son and daughter to have more in life than what she could give them, so she went to Big Brothers and Big Sisters.

I'm a retired teacher, an empty nester, and I'm in my glory helping my "little" Sis learn to cook, sew, shop smartly, do her homework, get exercise, solve her friendship problems.... you name it!

She enriches my life, and I hope I do the same for her.

#3-She should let her neighbours know of her situation. Some will have the intelligence and the heart to help her.

Also, communicate to a few close colleagues at work and see if a small group of people can help on a regular basis.

These children will need other families to interact with, help them with homework, etc. The mother's carrying a lot on her plate. If there's no help, her health will suffer.

#4-Call some children's activities classes, and ask to do something in exchange for lessons, e.g. agree to set up and put things away, clean up at the end of the class, etc.

#5-Tell her she's not alone. It is so very hard and discouraging at this point. She must have faith in herself. When she's able to do more, she will. Yes, other children will have more things... you can't help that. Someone else will always have more.

What she has is the will to get up every morning, put her feet on the floor, and push through the day. That's more than some others do.
She must never give up. I'm pushy and just refused to be beaten by my circumstances. I searched out places, got subsidy for daycare before and after-school care. Because of that subsidy, I was able to register my boys in summer camps that were also subsidized. They had a great time!

#6-Don't ever give up. You're the foundation of your family. You must stay in the game and stay strong. Keep reaching out; someone will give you a hand up.