My neighbour's husband keeps hitting on me and he's getting more blatant about it. In our building's gym, he'll touch my waist or leg when complimenting me on my fitness. He's started kissing my hand and faking a French accent anytime he greets me on the street.
He's a charmer with everyone, but especially forward with me. He's even commented to me about my husband being regularly away on sales trips, that he can keep me "from being lonely."
I know his wife's often ill with an intestinal condition, so I do feel sorry for him. But his pestering is getting uncomfortable.
Bothered
Tell the charmer you're not interested - period. Remove his hand, take your own away from his, and in response to his straight-up hit, say, "I'm not lonely, but I'm sure your wife could use your company."
My older sister has three children. She's always been successful at school, found a well-paying job right after University, and married a great guy.
I'm "the other sister." I struggled through school, dropped out of College, and make a modest living as a freelance graphic artist. (However, it's creative work that I love).
I went through two crummy relationships before I found my life partner, and, of course, he came with baggage. He has two daughters from a previous marriage, who stay with us every other weekend. They're good girls, and we get along, so I'm not complaining.
But I'm facing something I know I'm not handling well.... I can't get pregnant, and I'm pushing 35. We've been trying for three years, even went into debt for in vitro that didn't work.
My sister calls all the time and tries to be supportive, but I can hardly talk to her anymore. I know it's wrong to be jealous. What can I do about this empty place in my heart?
Desperate
Start filling that "empty place" with your good fortune - you love your partner, enjoy your work and your-step-daughters, and have a supportive sister.
Of course you envy her - that's natural, and probably reflects some feelings you had as the younger sibling, for years past.
But you're a grown woman now and need all the support and understanding you can get to hopefully remove as much stress as possible from your trying to get pregnant.
Continue to see your doctor to explore all possibilities. Keep up healthy nutrition and some exercise, to maintain your well being. On the emotional side, find balance and distraction in both work and relaxation. And maintain your intimacy with your partner in communication as well as sex.
All of these strategies provide a far better environment for you, than seeing your situation as inferior to your sister's.
You'd also benefit from talking to a therapist about any other holdovers of sibling jealousy you may be feeling, if it interferes with your peace of mind.
Counselling can also help you probe other options regarding having children, if that becomes something to consider.
I'm a male who works in a small office close to two gossipy women who chatter all day. They badmouth everyone they know, and criticize celebrities they don't know. If I say anything, I'll be on their hate list.
Going Mad
If you can't get moved or promoted to another work area, get earplugs. When the women ask why, say their conversations are so interesting it distracts you from what you're there to do. They'll probably miss the subtlety but you won't miss the chat.
My best friend's having an affair. I'm shocked, since I had no idea anything was wrong in her marriage. I like her husband, he's a good father, and I'd always only heard happy stories about things they do as a family, their successes at their jobs, and the kids' progress in school.
Now, every phone call and get-together is about her co-worker/lover, their great "secret" at work, where and when they "sneak away" to have sex, etc. What should I be saying to get her to stop this?
Disgusted!
Stop listening. She's flaunting this affair to you as if it's a romantic movie in which she's the star.
Tell her that if she's unhappy with her marriage, she needs to work on that with her husband, and not risk everything through escape. Tell her you disapprove of her deception, and that getting caught is worse than any problems she's avoiding.
Tip of the day:
The way to stop unwanted flirting is to be direct, and say NO.