My mother has mood swings that I feel have always been abnormal. One minute she’s very happy, and planning her next home renovation.
The next, she’s depressed, sitting in a dark room on the Internet. Next, she’s buying expensive things.
As a child, these things seemed fun and amusing. But, sadly, not always.
I suffered emotional abuse/trauma through verbal and even physical attacks.
Now, I’m 28, have a daughter, age four, and I’m pregnant.
We’ve always had arguments that stem from her moods switching and her becoming very argumentative, rude, and almost crazy.
Today, I went to her house before getting my daughter from daycare. She seemed in a good mood. Suddenly, she said I should pick up my daughter, that I’m leaving her too long. I said it’s fine.
She began pacing the house, unsettled, became confrontational and argumentative.
I got upset and said mean words back to her. She pushed me, called me a “cow,” and told me to never come back. She slammed the door and told my dad to come in.
He always defends her because he seems afraid of her.
I don’t want my daughter or my new baby to be around her, as she’s unstable.
My daughter loves my mother so much but I feel she’s sick and doesn’t respect me either. There’s been incidents like this all my life.
What’s so sad about your story is that no one in your family helped your mother (which would’ve helped you) understand and manage what was driving her extreme mood changes.
The symptoms you’ve described are familiar to bi-polar or manic-depressive disorders, and other health-significant possibilities.
Of course, she needed a doctor’s diagnosis of her condition, but for these and other mental health disorders there are treatments, medications, and also natural alternative therapies, too.
You’ve suffered abuse that should’ve been addressed for both your sakes, because she suffered, too.
She’s still at the mercy of these emotional highs and lows, until she gets checked and accepts professional help.
There’s no shame in her needing to treat an imbalance that’s negatively affecting her life and that of her family.
It’d be to your benefit and your children’s too, to encourage a thorough health investigation related to her symptoms, especially if there’s a genetic factor involved.
This isn’t the time to cut her off. It’s time to try very hard to encourage your parents to get help for her and hopefully bring peace into everyone’s lives.
Meanwhile, talk to a counsellor about the effect of all this on you, to get some support.
My niece is still breastfeeding her three-year-old. She wears no bra, just lifts her shirt wherever she is or her child lifts it and suckles.
This happens in restaurants, on the street, anywhere. There’s no sense of what’s appropriate.
I’ve seen single men ogling her bare breasts, and find it very upsetting.
In Canada, women have the right to breastfeed anywhere, anytime. In the U.S., 29 States plus the District of Columbia and the Virgin Islands exempt breastfeeding from Public Indecency laws.
The same protections apply in many countries.
Breastfeeding is promoted by the World Health Organization for up to two years, and many mothers embrace the practice for even longer, for health benefits for the child as well as convenience.
“Discretion” is a subjective matter left to individuals.
Others don’t have to look, though some people, myself included, find a healthy breastfeeding child presents a beautiful sight.
|Reader – “Aside from just not wanting to get married, another reasoncould be that he’s hiding a past criminal conviction.
“My husband’s much-younger brother was charged with sexual
assault when he was 14.
‘Despite all the help offered because of his youth, his name ended up
on a sexual offender list for 40 years for non-compliance of the court
order that he attend rehabilitation for three years.
“He’s had three serious relationships and, according to his mother, he
never told any of his companions about his criminal record.
“When his girlfriends start to push strongly for marriage, he ends the
relationship. He finds convenient excuses because he knows his
record will show up somewhere in the legalities of marriage.
“If this man has a history that he’s hiding, the writer’s decision
should depend on her expectations, not his lack of enthusiasm.”
Tip of the day:
When a family member regularly has severe mood swings, a health check-up is badly needed.