We’ve been dating for four months. I'm 27, have a full-time job, she’s 23, almost finished University.

I’d like to eventually call us a couple and her, my girlfriend.

She recently left a two-and-a-half year relationship and doesn’t want to be in one again.

However, we’ve both confessed love, and been physical.

She’s not sure where she sees things headed "right now." But she sees us getting serious in the long run.

When I suggest we go our separate ways since we're not on the same page, she says it's hard for her to let this all go. It is for me, too.

I’d like to continue seeing her but feel it’ll be a waste of time and hurt my feelings.

Uncertain Future

If you’re both not dating others, saying you’re in love, and having sex, you’re already a couple. She doesn’t want labels, likely spooked because of her recent break-up. You’re pushing for a warranty when, it isn’t necessary, for now.

Give the topic a rest for a while. Enjoy your dating, discuss some dreams and goals, and the future may soon appear less hazy.

Example: If she hopes to spend two years abroad, it’ll then be crucial to know where your relationship is heading.

I get along fairly well with my in-laws (six months’ married) but for family road trips, which my husband loves.

Recently, we crammed seven adults into the mini-van only to miss the ferry and wait two hours at the ferry terminal.
What I find frustrating: 1. Logistics are poorly planned with everyone else rushing at the last minute, and me always ready. My husband won’t drive ahead with me, because he and his sisters enjoy the “laughing and joking in the car” and, it’d increase the split of the ferry ride costs.

2. Their groupthink: They’re very close and think alike. When it’s just my husband and me, we can compromise. On trips, I have to fit their family mold.

I’ve tried to change my reaction, but end up frustrated and negatively affecting everyone else’s enjoyment.
The family’s asked us to go cabin camping with them and their 40 closest friends. Six of us (my husband and me, his parents and two sisters) are to share a one-room cabin with one queen-size and one single bed.

One of the many reasons why I fell in love with my husband is his family devotion. Can you suggest some ground rules for this event?

I don’t want to attend every family road trip (three or four yearly), I’d like us to choose one or two and have a great time.

Newly Married

Sounds like a great family, but lacking boundaries. So start setting some, showing only good intent for mutual enjoyment.

Raise the privacy issue. Yes, talk Sex. Even hint at future babies being a reason for couple time.

Tell your husband, his sister, your mother-in-law (whomever won’t overreact) that you and your husband like to “be alone sometimes” on a vacation, and the crowded cabin won’t do. You’ll willingly pay the extra for a separate cabin or at least one with two bedrooms.

You’re wise to limit yourselves to one-to-two of these trips. BUT, get into the mood (once you’ve made adjustments for some couple’s privacy). Take music/books you can get lost in, and a Zen attitude.

In time, children will change the picture somewhat, his sisters will want privacy, and the parents will travel less…

I’m betting you’ll miss the fun.

I’m a college freshman in a dorm room. I had a great roommate who transferred, leaving me scrambling for a new roommate and desperate for a new friend.
I accepted someone who seemed nice enough. However, she’s really immature and obnoxious. She says "like" repeatedly – annoying.

Worse, she’s obnoxiously noisy when she eats! I have a pet peeve for noise, so I'm super-frustrated with the smacking and excessive sounds.

I've put on headphones but, to be comfortable in my own room, I need to confront her.

Noise Averse

She has to put up with your quirks, too, in her own room.

Talk to her and agree to discuss both sides, who’s bothered by what. Don’t be nasty or attack her personality. She may nervously sense your judgment, hence the repeated “like.”

Tell her in a helpful way, that noisy eating is unpleasant for others. Without this explanation, your retreat to head phones is equally immature.