After one year together, my boyfriend and I must now enter a long-distance relationship due to some life changes. We have plans to be together again in the near future.

He’s always been honest about past relationships, including a fling with a co-worker.

It didn’t bother me before, as it ended long before we met. But he recently said he’d be spending more time with her for a project they were assigned.

He’s assured me that they’ll be meeting in public and there’s nothing to worry about. It does bother me that he’ll now be spending more time with her than he’ll spend with me.

Wary Girlfriend 

It’s a natural reaction but you can turn “wariness” to advantage by staying closer in touch and planning regular visits.

Greater romantic bonding can be gained from those intense, much-anticipated get-togethers!

Do NOT relate contact to this woman’s presence, or appear concerned. Just show your love and trust.

He’s told you about the past, and shown his trust that you two have a strong connection that’ll withstand the period of long distance. Give him the chance to prove it.

My nephew recently got married. The invitations were hand-delivered, my family all received theirs, but I’m not living in the same city as my nephew.

I told my mom that maybe I wasn’t invited. She finally asked him, he said yes.

Mom also said his fiancée doesn't want children at the reception, and no single person (which I’d recently become) can bring a guest.

My daughter, 11, isn’t a young child who can’t behave, and she’s the groom’s first cousin, so I figured she’s invited. My mom thought otherwise.

No one told me that I’d walk into the reception and find my name missing from the family table. Instead, the mother of the groom had her on-off boyfriend seated there!

I was so hurt and humiliated I left with my daughter. I was so upset for days; I even broke down at my workplace. But I was more upset for her, as there are many issues going on with her father's new girlfriend excluding her from his life.

Two days after the wedding, my other sister said I should’ve respected the “no children” rule. My family hasn't spoken to me since. 

My sisters can be very mean, I’ve struggled with them all my life, but my mom keeps walking out of my life, I won't hear from her for years.

I don't understand, I'm very respectful, yet my sisters call her degrading names and yell at her, and she remains in their lives and very close to their children, and barely sees my daughter.
If children weren’t welcome at the wedding reception, why was another nephew, 16, (not the groom's brother) invited?

Distraught Aunt

You and your daughter both have enough emotional stress going on without focusing on this wedding as a distraction.

There’s a lot of judgments in your family…. try to avoid them yourself. Troubles with your sisters will persist if you always go through your mother. Also, she apparently lives near them, so naturally keeps closer ties.

Yes, you’re correct in feeling that they could’ve been kinder to your daughter and you, but you also could’ve asked directly whether she could be considered, given the situation.

OR, accept that there’s always been a divide within your family, so during the stress of a separation, you’re best to write them off as unhelpful.

Meanwhile, do better for your daughter than has been done for you… and give her unconditional support.

We’re in our 50s, married over 25 years. I’ve been on different antidepressants for panic attacks and depression. These drugs affect sexual performance and drive. Often, I’m unable to climax.

My wife’s extremely shy about discussing this, so we don’t. I suggested a sexual therapist, but she rejected that.

It’s gotten worse. I’m unsure if the sex we have now is satisfactory for her. We have a great, loving relationship beyond this. What should I do?

No Solution?

Being loving, she may be purposefully shy to avoid embarrassing you. So get pro-active on your own.

See your doctor yourself, ask about the drugs, also discuss with a pharmacologist, and include seeing a sex therapist yourself. That “research” will give you information and ideas about possible solutions. You can then explain to her what you’ve learned, and start some new approaches.

If they provide more satisfaction, she’s unlikely to stay so shy.