Last fall, my two girlfriends, and I, all met the same attractive guy. My friend was the one who hooked up with him that night. Their relationship never went further, although she'd be extremely jealous whenever another girl talked to him.
Out of respect for her, I never pursued a relationship. My other friend, however, started texting and hanging out with him. She's now in a relationship with him.
This caused a huge blowout between both girls, but they've since rekindled their friendship.
I still like him, and am now angry with my friend who pursued him. If I'd known it wouldn't cost me a friendship, I'd have gone for it to begin with!

Whenever I speak to him, I feel like my dishonest intentions are all over my body language, because I just can't turn off my crush.
Being a good friend left me with nothing.

Can't Get Over It

He's obviously good at sending out availability vibes, and letting others chase him.

Wise up! A real relationship happens only when someone wants you as much as you want him. Your "crush" is over someone who'll move on when the next girl goes after him.

HE will leave you with nothing. It's your underlying sense of friendship and loyalty that actually saved you from being played.

I'm a gay male. My best friend and I had been extremely close for five years.
However he met another guy - ten years younger and very good-looking - several months ago. My friend became almost insanely paranoid, believing this guy was always cheating.

This boyfriend came into financial problems, so my friend asked me if the guy could move in with me and pay half the rent. It made sense for me financially. Plus the paranoia had died down somewhat.
But my friend immediately wanted reports - if he had anyone over, where he was going, etc. We had a huge fight over this as I said I wasn't a private eye.

It so happened his boyfriend was cheating and the relationship ended shortly after he moved in. My friend wanted me to kick him out, but I couldn't do this, as he'd have nowhere to go.

We had another fight over this but then things seemed fine.
Now my friend won't return phone calls or texts. Mutual friends have no idea why, nor do I. I question if I should've spied for him. Was I responsible for this or did I have a best friend with control issues?

Other friends say he always made the decisions about where we'd go and who to hangout with, etc. How do I figure out if this friendship is worth fighting for, or if I should just let it go?

Upset and Unsure

Be true to yourself, in all aspects of this situation. You had to refuse his request to do things against your basic principles - the spying and evicting. Now that he's turned against you, make ONE major effort to find out why - send an email, leave a phone message, write a letter, and ask friends to inquire.... but then, drop it.

You shouldn't have to beg for his friendship. And if he wasn't a total control freak before, keeping this silence much longer puts him in that category.

Do NOT turn this against yourself. As far as you know, you did nothing wrong. As a "best" friend, he knew your character and shouldn't have been surprised at your honourable decisions.

My love interest in India keeps phoning but I'm reluctant to pick it up because I don't want to hurt her feelings.

Yet my heart longs for company here, someone to talk to, walk with hand in hand, and admire the nature in this most beautiful country.

I've decided to call off this Internet relationship once and for all. Unless you give me some advice otherwise.

Lonely and Longing

It's colder, meaner, and somewhat cowardly to break off a relationship without fulsome explanation. You call her your love interest, so you must've had feelings and conveyed them at some time.

If you can't afford to go further with this and arrange a meeting in person, either there or here, say so. If you feel finances or changed feelings are suggesting you move on, say so. Or, if you're just frustrated with being apart, say that. Being fair and honest might bring a surprising response.